Burden To Those Who Want

.01

Hi, my name is Morgan Lease. I had always been my parent's youngest child and Tina lease, my older sister, has always had everything passed to her. I have always gotten my sister's hand-me-downs, even though I have a job and she doesn't. The only thing that is stopping my sister and making her hate me is that I was passed something she wanted. I was given the company that my parents own, but I only get that when I turn 20. I don't want their company, I never wanted it. My sister now treats me like I don't exist to her. She is 20 years old and still acts like a child.

Today though, it had my mind off the wall since I get bullied a lot in school, and now that I'm in the cafeteria eating lunch at a table by myself. No one in school wants to be my friend because apparently, I'm a girl who gets everything she wants. I don't get everything I want my sister does and no when I was younger I would lock myself in my room because my parents would forget about me all the time. When they would come to apologize, they only came to give me money to hush me up. 

I hated it when they did that, yeah just give me money to stop whining about them forgetting me even though I live there, thanks a lot. I want people to notice me and be my friends, go outside, and have fun with me. No, that's never going to happen even if I wanted it to in a dream I have. I started eating my lunch when a guy sat in front of me. I knew him.

His name is Sam Flores and he has got to be the cutest guy I have ever seen in my life. I swear, but right now I'm trying to figure myself out and make sure that I want someone who loves me more than my parents ever did. He looks at me and waves before saying hi, but instead I ask him a question. "What are you doing at this table, don't you have friends or something?" 

He looked surprised and said, "No, I don't have friends I just want to sit with someone I know who has a good personality, unlike the rest of the school." I shook my head, "If you want someone like that then you shouldn't be sitting with me, because everyone calls me the princess of the town. Apparently, I get everything that I want from my parents." He didn't say anything from there. I wondered about him for the rest of the day. I asked myself a question though. 

Why would a cute guy like him want to sit with a 'princess' like me?

I went home thinking about that over and over again until my sister stopped me at the front door and asked me if I had 50 dollars to go to the mall with her friends. I said no, but she kept insisting that I give her money to go with her friends. Instead, my mother gave her 47 bucks to spend. I hated when I would be scolded for not helping out my sister with what she wanted since she is my older sister and the fucking princess in my parent's eyes. Tina has always been that to them. An angel was what they said she was, but in my eyes, she was a monster in disguise. I hated her, but no because my parents loved her and it made me angry to see that they didn't even love me as they did her. 

I went into my room and locked my door. I slid down the door clutching my hand on my skirt until my knuckles turned white. I had anger issues, but no one would help me and it hurt so much to see that no single person was going to tell me it was going to be okay. I just want something to help me cope with how much anger I feel toward others. 

Can't I just have that once, please?

I made my way to my bed, taking off my school clothes and putting on my pajamas. I got under the covers, just laying here in bed calms me down now that I know I can just think freely about what I want. Please give me something to think about tonight.....

Please!?