Burden To Those Who Want

.04

It was finally the end of class. For some reason, I couldn't pay attention to the lesson like I always do. I made my way over to where the bleacher would be, outside. It's about 85 degrees outside and I hate when summer weather comes this time around. I made my way over to the back of the bleacher, where he stood patiently. "What do you want, newbie?" "I just wanted to get to know you like seriously you are an amazing person aside from your sister who needs help," he chuckled to himself. I laughed at his stupid comment. We both got to know each other since I had the second period as a study hall. 

"Hey sunshine, what you up to?" Sam said walking up to me, obviously nothing. I like when I and sam hang out, but what was I trying to find in myself anyway. Am I trying to date? Am I trying to stay single? Do I want to date? Do I want a boyfriend? Is there something I'm looking for in someone? I don't know, but when I'm with Sam he makes me feel like I mean something to someone. "nothing just getting my stuff from my locker and maybe skipping class," I smiled. "Don't skip, it makes your grades drop a lot trust me I know." I grabbed my chem textbook and my notebook to take my notes in. He closed my locker for me and walked me to class. I ended up getting glares from other girls and a scoff from my teacher. I knew my chem teacher hated me the most because she always tried to fail me, even though I knew the answers to the questions that she gave everyone. 

The class ended early today, but something was off because everyone stared at me and started whispering things. My sister walked up to me in her cheer uniform. God, please let this day end already. I hate this. Please. 

"I know you slept with Sam you slut," She said, making me seriously want to punch her for making assumptions about him and me. I hated that she thought we slept together even though I'm a fucking VIRGIN. Why would I sleep with someone I barely know? DUMB!? "We didn't sleep with each other, we were just studying for the final exams that are coming up next month, and you know that." 

I walked away from her after saying that. I heard her scoff at me as my teacher did, but I also felt like I was going to cry. It hurt so much. I couldn't hold it in. I bumped into someone in the hallway, It was Sam. His face softened, and he hugged me. I cried into the sleeve of his shoulder and told him what my sister had told me. Was I that bad of a person? Am I ever going to find myself? Why am I falling through a dark hole? 

We went back to his house since I told him I didn't want to be at mine because I knew Tina told my parents about the false rumor she spread. We sat there on his bed and I had my arms around his torso. I wanted to scream, but it just wasn't coming out. "Hey, it's okay. You know that most people aren't going to believe it when I tell them it's not true." "I just don't want them to think that Sam I want them to know I didn't sleep with you, you are a good guy and all, but I just don't know you that well," I said unwrapping my arms from around him and sitting up. "I know I just don't want you to feel bad okay, you didn't do anything wrong sunshine." 

I giggled a bit, but I knew he was wrong. They believe anything they think is going to be true, whether it's me being a slut or me being a virgin (and them calling me a prude or attention seeker). I was once called a whore and I know some people can understand how hard it is to be called that and it just sticks till the next person is called one. It's always high school and junior high am I right? Sam laughed a little grabbing my hand and looking me in the eyes softly.

"you know they are going to forget about that because I have a plan, my sunshine," he grinned evilly. I left later that night and went home, but when I got there my dad was waiting with a belt in his hands. My mom stared at me angrily. "Why did you let that boy touch you Morgan, huh, why?" I was scared of what would happen, but my dad was a scary person so I couldn't complain.

"No dad, I didn't let him touch me, we didn't sleep with each other I swear. We were just studying, you know I would never," I said trying to hide the crack and scaredness in my voice. He stood up looking at me with hatred in his eyes. I was extremely afraid now. I wanted this to end. Please no. "You little slut, you think we are going to fall for that. You know what go upstairs and we will be in there shortly Morgan, NOW," My mother said pointing to the stairs. 

I went up the stairs, tears brimming my eyes as I looked at each step up. Tina was waiting there with a smirk. Was this it? Was it my fault for being born? I wish I was with my aunt. Help me, please.