I woke up with the vivid memories from past, my head was still heavy from the thoughts of last night. I searched for my phone expecting an apology or a good morning message but neither of them was there, but there was a message, a message to shatter me more into pieces, to make me hate myself more, to make me cry more.
"Good luck with your life, I am happy, I hope you move on too"
How can he be simply happy, how can he be? Doesn't he remember all those memories we made together or the time he spent with me or the promises we made? Doesn't he remember an inch of them? Was I too worthless that he played with me like a toy and threw me away but he doesn't even miss me, he doesn't even care about me, how could he be so evil, how can anyone be so evil? He spent a whole god damn year with me, how can he even do that? How do people fake love when it's hard for me to fake smiles.
Lying on the floor, I noticed my leg, the blood that flowed last night had already dried up, I wish the pain dried up the same way, but it did not, it just did not. An empty bottle of anti depression pills was lying on the floor, but the depression was too deep to get off from the pills, these pills didn't seem to work. does anything actually works?
I stared at myself in the front camera of my phone, the face which had usually a smile on it seemed too gloomy today, just then I heard a voice, it sounded too familiar but nothing like that I imagined talking to me. I turned around and saw myself, another me standing in front of me, the evil me, passing an evil grin at me, she spoke and spoke and the words came out of her mouth but the feelings did not,
"you should go and tell him that you don't even care about him, stop being a coward bitch and stand up for yourself, you can do it! you don't need him or anything about him and stop caring about those memories cause they should not mean anything to you anymore, its long gone and you have to move on..."
and suddenly it vanished.
I screamed so hard at the thought of it, the thought of him leaving me but it just didn't affect him in any possible way, I wish it did but I really did not.
I tried to get up from the floor I felt asleep on last night, my whole body was suffering from pain due to it but I guess it was nothing compared to the pain my heart was suffering from, I cried and cried but the tears did not seem to stop. I screamed but no one came for help, no one asked how was I doing, no one seemed to care and I was on my own now. Even the so called 'bestfriends' did not bother to call me even though I had not been replying to their messages. At that point in life I understood that noone in the world really matters, no one would care for you and no one will comfort you with lies and you've to face the reality and in the end, it's just you and your God that you'll be left with. No one will tell you that you will be okay and no one will tell you that you will be fine and everything will be alright, no one would.
