Dear whoever,

2

JULY 17

Dear whoever,

Its been almost a week since I've written in this thing. I guess I haven't had anything worth writing about occur in my life. I still don't now. But my break is an hour long and I have nothing better to do. Quinn doesn't use her break time often. She hates wasting time. So this is the perfect opportunity for me to write in this damn thing without her finding out. I haven't been doing so well at work. I lost the sliver of enthusiasm I had for this job long time ago. But now it's obvious. I don't want to be here.

Today I feel: tired

tired of trying to try my best and failing

tired of feeling stuck

"Hey man." I shut the notebook quickly as the footsteps approached me. "What's good?" Jerome, who works at the cubicle next to mine greeted.

"Just getting some fresh air." I replied monotonously. We had about 16 of us working on the second floor of the building. The other three floors were used for different small businesses. Almost every day I took the flight of stairs at the back of the building that lead up to the roof, to enjoy my hour break in peace and solitude. And almost every day Jerome would show up, smoke a cigarette or two, and then head to the break room to have some snacks. He always attempted to make conversation. The guy was as persistent as Quinn and I've grown to tolerate his presence. Sometimes.

After a while he asked curiously."What's that?" I raised an eyebrow at him in question.

"What's what?" I knew he was talking about the notebook. But I had been crossing my fingers since he got here, hoping he wouldn't ask about it. Jerome was a little too talkative for my liking. He easily made friends with everyone in the office. His head of long blonde dreads and sea green eyes had all the ladies in the office swooning over him. I heard their gossip in the printer room. They thought I was rude and troubled, while Jerome was 'so sweet and buff like oh em gee!' When Quinn wasn't employee of the month, Jerome's name would be plastered on the wall instead. He was charming and easygoing. But he was also nosey.

"What's that book in your lap?" I clenched my jaw, feeling annoyed already.

"Uh, It's just, it's a uh, sketch book." I was always terrible at lying.

"Like for drawing?" He asked skeptically.

"Yup. I like to draw," I looked out at the city in front of us. It was a cloudy day with a sixty percent chance of showers, I remembered the weather forecaster saying on the news this morning. "scenery. I like drawing scenery." I said more confidently this time.

"Really dude? That's awesome!" He said enthusiastically. "Lemme see some of your work man!" My eyes widened a little. I remember my mother always telling me when I was younger that one lie, always lead to another. Damn it she's always right.

"Uh, I just bought this new notebook yesterday. Since ya know, I used up every inch of paper in my last notebook. And I haven't drawn anything in this one yet."

He nodded his head, convinced. Wow, this guy was gullible. "Well, when you draw something lemme know man!" He got out his pack of cigarettes and his lighter and I knew that the conversation was finally over.

After a while, he moved away from the wall we were both sitting against and chucked what was left of his cigarette over the roof. Boss hated that, but Jerome was excellent at his job so he got away with it.