Rational Thinking {Kol Mikaelson}

Chapter Twenty: Godspeed, Sucka'

The sky was grey overhead and mist dampened your hair and clothes. The air was wet and pleasant, bridging on cold. It was such a small and casual thing - over just like that. Like any other goodbye in the world. Nothing to fear at all, really. Looking around, it was the greens of nature that stuck out to you through the mist. There was life all around you, even though you were quite dead. No, your life was not ending here, as you had always feared it might. It was merely taking another path.

Smiling to yourself, you were back behind the wheel of your sweet ride merely an eye blink later. Kol was there to take your hand as you put the car into gear and began driving. You had no idea where you were going and no idea how far away that place was. There was something exciting in that, you thought.

"Are you alright, love?" Kol asked.

You smiled, soft and simple. "I'm better than I thought I'd be," You answered.

"That's good."

The mist turned to rain as you drove out of town. Behind the clouds, the sun set and it grew dark. Yet, you didn't feel the darkness within yourself. The dashboard of your car glowed. That was enough light for you. Kol turned on the radio and you laughed because you'd forgotten just how awful Virginia radio stations were. It was a simple, simple moment and you had a lot of those to look forward to.

Shortly thereafter, you headlights illuminated a familiar sign on the side of the road.

Now leaving Mystic Falls, it read. We hope you come back soon.

You weren't going to.

"Y/N, WATCH OUT!"

You saw the figure standing in the road at the same time as he did and slammed on the brakes. Your tires were certainly putting in the hours these last few days. The man didn't move and the car skidded to a stop merely inches in front of him. You saw blond hair and a flash of yellow eyes. Glancing at Kol, he gave you a firm nod and a comforting smile. The figure rounded the car and your boyfriend rolled down his window - only a few inches, he wouldn't be inviting a dagger today.

"What's the fuss, Nik?" He asked, unassuming as could be. "This better be good, I've heard tires are awfully expensive."

"Why don't you step out here so we can converse properly?" His brother suggested, clasping his hands behind his back.

"No, I think I'm good in here, thanks." Kol's thumb stroked the back of your hand.

The man outside leaned down and the curl of his lips was anything but friendly.

"So," Klaus began, "you've lost me my map?"

"Incorrect," You countered. "We saved you a headache."

The hybrid's eyes narrowed. "Is that so?"

"Uh, huh."

"And who are you exactly?" He questioned. Kol watched him, tense - waiting for the slightest sign of movement.

"I'm leaving," You said. "So that makes me nobody, really. I'm just gonna have to figure that out."

He nodded once - a firm not-quite dismissal. Then his eyes snapped back to his brother. "Where's the White Oak, Kol?"

"The what?"

He grinned innocently. 65% of the human body is comprised of water, but you were were quite sure that in Kol's case, that 65% was claimed by sheer freaking audacity.

"Don't play games with me, Kol." Klaus snarled. "You took the White Oak Stake from Rebekah. I know you have it. "

"Do I?" The boy hissed. Unwilling to take his eyes off his brother for a second, his head inclined just slightly in your direction. "Say, Y/N - do we?"

You shrugged. "I dunno. Did you remember to put it in the suitcase before we went through customs?"

"Pretty sure I did..."

"Did ya' leave it anywhere?"

"Well, that's the thing I don't-" He gasped mockingly and snapped his fingers. "Gas station in Vermont!" He exclaimed. "That's where I left it. I knew I was forgetting something, damn it!"

"Kol..." The hybrid warned. You could see his jaw working.

"That's where I left it, Nik." He shrugged. "Gas station in Washington - cross my heart and hope to die."

Klaus tilted his head, a thin approximation of a smile stretching across his face. "You said Vermont."

"Whoops." Kol met his silent threat with a placid expression, voice toneless and smooth. "And here I go contradicting myself again."

Klaus hummed, nodding - eyes narrowed to slits. Twelve heartbeats passed in silence before he shifted to lean against the car. "You know I could kill your lovely companion here, right? I'm stronger and faster now, brother. You wouldn't be able to stop me."

Your boyfriend smirked. "Go ahead," He challenged, eyes dancing with something agile and fast. You understood now why legend compared him to a fox.

"It would be easy," Klaus continued. "Like snuffing out a candle."

"Then by all means, have at it." Kol said, voice firmer now. "Do it and you'll never find the stake for as long as you or I shall walk this earth."

The hybrid's eyes flashed, quite literally. "What have you done with it?" He demanded.

"We buried it," You supplied, easily. "We stuck it in a Tupperware box, wrapped it in Rudolf-the-Red-Nosed-Reindeer wrapping paper, labeled it handle with care, and buried it forty feet underground."

"Where?" He hissed.

"Well, see I'd love to tell ya' that, but..." You trailed off, waving at Kol.

"Each of us has memorized only half the information pertaining to it's exact location," He said.

"One of us was blindfolded on the way there, and the other on the way back," You continued. "The only person who knows all the directions to get there, is a hiker we kindly asked to assist us."

"Who I ate afterward," Kol finished.

The man outside the car nodded mutely. He just stood there, working his jaw for a solid three minutes. Crickets chirped in the distance.

He swore suddenly and pushed off the car, crossing his arms. "So let me get this straight-"

"If you dagger me, you'll never find the only thing that can kill you," Kol reasoned, smirking. "If you kill her, you'll also never find the only thing that can kill you."

Klaus glared. "I think you know I can get very creative with my persuasive methods," He said.

"I have also been compelled to forget my portion of the information," You declared, raising your hand as if in a classroom. "I'll only remember it if Kol resends the compulsion and, frankly, good freaking luck with making him do that."

Kol just shrugged as his brother's eyes snapped to him, flaring with rage. "You can't touch me, brother," He said, smirking. "Now, are we done here?"

"Yeah, I wanna go see Rio," You added. Klaus cursed again and stepped back, nodding.

"You can run, dear brother of mine," He said. "You can scamper off to the ends of the earth, but know this: The day will come that I should find you, having obtained that weapon you've so glibly hidden, and on that day I will force you to watch as I drive it into your little plaything's heart. I'll let you watch as the light fades from those testy little eyes, and I'll let you weep as you hold her lifeless corpse, and only once you are begging to join her in death will I leave a dagger at your feet. No, I will not kill you. I'll simply let you choose how you wish to suffer for the rest of eternity."

Kol raised a brow, unimpressed.

"Sounds fun." He shrugged and whipped out a pair of sunglasses. Where he got them, you had no idea. He pushed them onto his face and grinned. "But you'll have to catch us first." Then he twiddled his fingers in a wave and rolled up the window. He turned to you.

"Floor it, darling."

"With pleasure."