Ecstasy [h.s.]

24

May 20, 2023

I lean against the penthouse balcony railing, letting the cool metal press into my skin. I take another deep breath and let out a contented sigh as I gaze at the scene in front of me. The pool below is surrounded by lush greenery, a stark contrast to the concrete and steel of the surrounding buildings around us. The sound of a distant car horn in the city breaks the stillness.

The second Jacksonville concert has just ended, and we're all back at our penthouse. I don't think Harry knew that I had seen him with that girl yesterday, and I think I'd done a pretty good job of hiding it. I didn't want him to think I was making a big deal out of something as stupid as a hookup. I'd sprinted out of the venue with Briar and Alex as quickly as I could, both of them slightly confused at my rush.

I couldn't help the irritation I felt after accidentally walking in on him though. And my irritation at my irritation. Why did I care so much? Why did it both me? It was probably just because their objectification of girls was so fucking annoying.

Right?

It's not like I was expecting anything, I know what a hookup meant. I never thought I was particularly clingy, and I didn't want to be that girl who expected a whole full-fledged relationship after a single night where we didn't even have sex. I really didn't want to act like that with someone like Harry; that's exactly how I'd get hurt.

So why did I still feel like this?

I reach up and brush a blonde strand of hair out of my face. The breeze has picked up, causing my hair to dance around me like a flame. I close my eyes and tilt my head back, letting the wind play with my hair.

The night sky above is a deep navy blue, punctuated by the occasional star. I can hear the distant hum of the city, but up here on the balcony, it feels like I'm in my own little world. It's a peaceful feeling, one that I don't often get to experience in my stupid life with stupid Harry and this stupid band and this stupid job.

Well, I actually do like my 'stupid' job.

I take another deep breath, letting the scent of the night-blooming jasmine fill my lungs. The fragrance is heady, almost overwhelming, but in the best possible way. The pool is quiet and empty, and I feel the strong urge to go down to the pool tonight, just to get away from everything and feel some peace for some time. I turn around and head back into the depths of my room, closing the balcony doors behind me. 

I grab the black bathing suit from the pile of clothes on my bed and hold it up, examining it. It's a simple one-piece with a scoop neck and low back, but I love the way it fits me. The black fabric is sleek and sophisticated, and I feel confident whenever I wear it. I recall how Lila made me pack it for the beach before we had left for the tour.

I slip out of my clothes and stand in front of the mirror, stepping into the bathing suit. I then begin to pull it up over my hips. The fabric clings to my skin, hugging me in all the right places. I adjust the straps and smooth out any wrinkles, making sure that it fits just right. I then put on my deep violet coverup and my sandals before slipping out of my room. I head downstairs, past the hall of rooms. 

I quietly tip-toe down the stairs, my hands grazing against the wooden railing as I pad across the living room. The whole space is empty, but I can hear the chatter of everyone else upstairs in one of the rooms. I have no idea what they're doing, and I quite don't really care right now. I honestly just want some peace right now for some time.

I open up the backdoor leading out to the pool. As I step out onto the balcony, the warm night air wraps around me like a comforting blanket. The lights of the city twinkle in the distance, a reminder of the world beyond this private oasis.