Incandescently | Dead Poets Society

Eleven

"I can't exactly describe how I feel, but it's not quite right. And it leaves me cold." F. Scott Fitzgerald

"We need help here!" Father shouts out as we rush into the hospital's front entrance, carrying a still unconscious Neil in his arms. Charlie has not relinquished his grip on me, and Todd has taken one of my arms also, as I have not stopped shaking or crying. "Someone, please help!" I cry, my throat growing hoarser by the second. At the sound of both our pleas, a doctor quickly rushes forward and after analysing Neil's froth covered mouth, he beckons a team of doctors and nurses over. Father lays him down on a stretcher that they bring over, and his worried eyes flash from myself to him.

"Please tell me that you can help Neil, you have to save him," I beg, catching the attention of that first doctor who appeared, and he quickly notices my vulnerable state. He sends the team away with Neil before he places a hand on my free shoulder, hoping to calm me down, even just a little. "What's your name, madam?" He asks, to which I give him my full name, as I have done to anyone I introduce myself to for the first time. "Miss Keating, I promise you that we will do all we can to help and save him." All I can do is nod through my floods of tears, and with nothing else to add, the doctor walks away.

Once he has walked away, I turn my face into Charlie's shoulder and immediately let all my tears fall free, dampening his jumper. I feel his arms wrap around me in support, quickly followed by Todd, who starts whispering mumbles of comforting words. "He has to be okay, he has to be okay," I ramble as another set of hands take me out of Charlie and Todd's embrace, and I turn around to see Father's worried face. "He's going to be okay, right?" I ask him, and all he can do is pull me into his chest. He delivers another sympathetic embrace and when we part, he turns to address the rest of the group.

"There's nothing more we can do tonight, so we should all return to the school," he says and whilst almost all of them agree, Charlie and Todd both shake their heads. Father questions why they do not wish to return, and they both turn their attention towards me, pointing out how emotional I am currently. "I cannot leave," I say, my voice coming out in a cracked cry, "I apologise, but there is no chance of me leaving without knowing that Neil is okay. I cannot leave, and I will not."

Father lets out a short sigh; he is unable to stay throughout the night, as he has several lessons to teach tomorrow. "We'll stay with her, Mr. Keating," Todd says, interlinking his arm with mine and giving it a supportive squeeze. "I'll stay too," Knox pipes up, walking over to stand by my side and giving me the kindest smile he possibly can. Meeks and Pitts both state that they will stay behind as well, but Cameron notably turns his attention away and mumbles something that none of us quite pick up.

"Are you all sure?" Father asks, and each of the boys nod their heads. "Well, alright then. I'll come back when I'm able to tomorrow and collect you all." We all nod our heads in response, but I reach forward for one final embrace with him, and I feel him press a light kiss on the top of my head. "I love you, Father," I whisper. "I love you too, darling," he replies, and then he makes his way out of the hospital entrance, Cameron following close behind him.

"I have the book with me," I hear Meeks say, and when I turn around, I see him holding onto Father's handed-down copy of Five Centuries of Verse. He gives me a smile, and then hands the book down to Charlie, who looks to me without his signature smirk. "I think we should hold an impromptu meeting of the Dead Poets," he suggests, gesturing to the nearest bunch of hospital waiting chairs, "only if you want to, Elizabeth." With the most genuine smile I feel I can muster, I take his hand and lead the group over to the chairs, one of which I sit down on and let out a short exhale.