I want to break the cage- Game of Thrones- A song of ice and fire

Chapter VI

"There coming here! All of them, coming here!" I could hear Mrs Mordane yelling. My employer had apparently gone to Highgarden and invited some of the Tyrells and their party here. So, now I would meet the Miss Margaery. I wonder...

"I will help you." I said, pushing the door that led to the kitchen and standing in the doorway. Mrs Mordane and one of the skullery maids smiled at me. Over the next four days, there was so much preparation. Curtains and drapes were pulled back letting light in, ten more people were recruited to help with the preparation, bedding was laid out, rooms cleaned, new recipes found, clothing ironed and pressed, and Shireen was so excited I thought she might burst. It was the fact of her wanting to meet proper ladies like in France.

Whence the day of the arrival came, it late evening, me and Shireen were in the library reading. But as she heard the carriages and horses, my student ran out of the library and to the front door. I managed to get up in time to pull her too the side of the corridor as she smiled at every guest. As Miss Margaery walked in, she spared me not a glance.

She was a great beauty, that was clear, with sloping shoulders, an olive complexion, small waist and hands, a long graceful neck and a head of fine chestnut curls. It was now clear why Mrs Mordane was puzzled about the delay in marriage. For she was a beauty but, I did not believe she was kind nor free of spite.

Although, I almost wished a woman of such, position would approach me, of course there is a hint of jealously. But I wished more for friendship than comparisons. The late afternoon of the next day brought me and Shireen outside to the normal place. Me sitting on the white wicker chairs and Shireen playing badminton with Eda. Except, it wasn't the same. As my employer was not in the seat next to me.

He and Miss Tyrell had taken some air together in the lower gardens. Laughing and smiling she would touch his arm, often, wrapping her hand around his muscled bicep. Pulling close to his body and fluttering her eyelashes. It send a pain to my stomach and I had never felt it before. Well, once, when I was jealous of Myrcella because of her clothes but- wait, am I jealous of Miss Margaery? Is the image of her and my employer so painful that I do not want to see it?

Then it hit me. I care for him.... It seems, that I want to have his company but, only me to have his company, and only me to smile at him. Now I think of it, Little Bird, probably doesn't even mean to much, the fact that it was only made, because I told him I like birds. I almost created it, he's probably given her a nickname, that he made up. Maybe, the summer rose or, great beauty. I am not one, and I could not compete with her on that front.

My face is pale and my hair is the colour of the devil, I am neither more beautiful nor happy as she, I am shorter than her, my waist is larger, I have no fine clothes, to think, I have only interacted with one man, she probably had many suitors. Why was I ever jealous? There's no point in feeling something if you have no intention or means to get what you are pining for.

The two were walking up the steps to the stone balcony behind me. As they stopped I heard Miss Tyrell.

"You must agree that schooling is better than a governess?" He didn't answer.

"Well, mayhaps you are confused. I cannot think of a worse thing than a governess. They are never, high born, as you could say. With any real goals for life, they make children miserable with lessons at home. Whilst children should be at good English boarding schools. In my experience, they are dreadfully boring and annoying. I personally got rid of all of mine, in ways I should not tell. Maybe you might ask Loras, we were, quite, let's just say very defiant in our hate of them." Her laugher made me sag my shoulders and hang my head.

I stood up, and felt tears in my eyes. Wiping my face, I turned around and brushed past my employer back into the house. As I walked into the hall and down the main corridor I walked into the library. Sitting down I was once again greeted by the pups. Who didn't really look like pups anymore. Lady jumped up onto my lap and licked my face where the tears were. Sniffing I stroked her head.