Bodies

trente

As Milan got ready to meet Tatiana, her mind was running rampant with all the things that could go wrong. It was a hot May day, so she was putting on a chocolate brown sundress, not too far off from her own skin tone, and a dark denim blue jean jacket. She wore wedge flip flops for an elevated look, literally.

She also kept her accessories simple, clasping a gold dangly anklet on her leg before she stood up straight in the mirror.

Milan never took her ability to lay her own hair down and melt a wig flawlessly for granted. Today, she chose to give the girls a calm 30 inch curly unit, minimal baby hairs, and maximum scalpage. 

It was something about meeting the girl Ramses had spent most of his late teens and early twenties with. She was insecure, but not even when it came to looks.

Only when it came to him.

Because Tatiana did know him better. She knew his favorite food, she knew what movie he likes to put on when he's just lounging around the house... she knew him when he was not in survival mode.

And Milan felt like all she knew was his militant side and of course, what the sex was like with him.

However, she did not feel close to him. It literally felt like a trauma bond, and that is what made her insecure.

Because Tatiana was a bigger asset to his case than she could ever be, and the only way she could know him like Tatiana knew him was if he was able to beat this case. She hated that the only way they could continue, which wasn't even guaranteed, is if she was on board.

Trying her best to push those "woe-is-me" thoughts out of her head, Milan went to the closet of her hotel room and picked out a bright orange mini purse to be her pop of color amongst the dark brown and denim of her clothing. 

Spraying herself down with her favorite perfume and doing a once over spin in the mirror again, she declared herself ready to go and went downstairs to her car.

For some reason, Milan also wasn't scrambling to leave the hotel she was at either. She enjoyed having her own space and even more so the fresh towels she got every morning without having to do laundry. She had made such good friends with housekeeping that they know allowed her to use the washer and drawer of the establishment. 

This was her first time living on her own without her brother-- or anyone else of that matter. 

And as long as she was able to afford it, she was not going to rush herself on getting her feet. 

As Milan got in her car and threw her purse in the backseat, she truly took the time to check in with herself. She knew she was already complaining about how her life had changed so much, and been effected so heavily by her involvement with Ramses and even Marcus. 

But she knew this would happen when she first started out.

She knew she never truly wanted anything with Marcus. They had been co-workers for over a year and up until when she got desperate, she knew she never saw anything in him. Milan hated that she wasted both of their time.

She also knew what dealing with Ramses would bring her. No matter how much he swore to keep her out of the mix. He was the mix. Him and her brother. Saving him was fine, but her getting romantically involved with him brought exactly what she knew it would.

Pain and chaos.

Something gang life thrived off of. 

And Milan wanted normal. She was a civilian, and she didn't want anything less or anything more.