nothing new |ethan landry

two. first kill

My first kill was my father. I killed him. My fathers blood was on my hands. And I felt this type of rush when I killed him, but not type you would think.

This rush I felt, it was a rush of sickness, a plaguing in the lower pits of my stomach. I killed him, maybe it wasn't me who stabbed him fifteen times, but it was on me. I'm the reason my father is dead.

I saw who did it. Not their face, but their body, and I knew who it was, not at the time, but I cursed myself for days and nights for not suspecting them in the first place.

     My dads brother, who he practically raised always felt this type of resentment towards him. Maybe he was jealous of the bakery, or that he go to spend more years of life with their parents before they went crazy, or even that we had a closer relationship than him and his daughter. Whatever it was , he did it. His prints were there, he was seen buying the knife, he confessed that he had actually done it, but he told them that he was threatened into it. I want to believe it, but I can't. He took away the one person that was always there for me.

Then there was Ethan, who came into my life, and left. It was my fault. It's always been my fault.

Ethan Landry. The first time I met him it was only a few months before my dad was murdered. I always knew I wanted to go to school somewhere near me so Blackmore was the best option. I was touring the campus when I first saw him, both of us trying to grab the last campus map from our tour guide.

   "You have it." He offered in a nice tone. Hearing his voice I wanted to memorize it, I wanted to hear it more than once.

   "You can have it seriously. I'll just share with someone when we get put into our groups."

I was planning on sharing with my friend Brook if I got put in her group, but I didn't, so I ended up sharing the map with Ethan.

  After that day of touring our school we sort of bonded, atleast for a while. We traded socials and spent a lot of time texting back and forth, planning to meet up once school started, and we did, but it was different. My dad had died and I felt like I had no one in my life, so I went to him for comfort. It went from a friendship to something romantic as soon as we entered college.

I would skip a few classes to hang out with him, and we'd talk about marvel movies, eat twizzlers and come up with some of the dumbest jokes. Randomly something just seemed to click. We started spending less and less time together, until we just stopped completely.

Then the party happened and all of a sudden we were talking again, even walking close together.

    "What's your costume?" I asked to break the silence made between Ethan and I, both walking away from the rest of the group.

    "I'm Christopher Hawley from murder party. One of my friends suggested it."

   "Murder party? I've never heard of it"

    "It's this horror comedy movie. The movie is shit though. I was just asking around for ideas and thought the costume looked cool."

"That movies actually awful." Mindy chimed in after hearing our conversation.

"Agreed." Anika proclaimed.

"You've seen it too? How come I'm the only one who hasn't?" I questioned feeling dumb for never watching it.

"I think it's cause it's for certain crowds. We watched it in film class." Anika and Mindy linked arms the rest of the way to Sams apartment, while Ethan and I made small talks

   When we made our way to the apartment Tara went straight to her room. I wanted to go to her, comfort her, but in my state I didn't know how.

   "I should give her some space, I'm gonna go downstairs." Sam left the apartment shortly after we got there.