The Oldest Sano

3

(Mika's pov)

Looking at your family's eyes filled with tears, their mouths open in shock, made you feel like 'damn.. I wish I died.'

I knew they blame theirself for not being on my side while I was having a hard time, but i wanted that way. I knew I couldn't stand them seeing their big old sister in that state. I didn't want help from them. I did that to myself. It's all my fault he died. I deserved this. Do I even deserve to get better?

These. These sick thoughts killed me inside. And made me want to kill my body as well. Sadly they couldn't succeed. These last two years were hell in real life. I don't even remember some parts. I believe my brain deleted the traumatizing parts. They are still there though. Somewhere inside.

I placed my arm in back, feeling uncomfortable them staring. I needed to get ready. I knew they were going to ask what happened. I wasn't feeling ready but I had no time to prepare myself. A sigh escaped my lips.

''Years didn't treated me well...''

**

august 14 2003 moon out

It was already night time. Another day spent in the shop with Shin.

Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. I was lying on the couch, reading a book called 'No Longer Human'. It catched my attention, so I was binge reading.

''Nee-san you can leave first I'm going to work all night'' Shin shouted under the bike he was working on.

Of Course I wasn't going to let him be alone. It was dangerous.

''If you think I am letting you then you're an idiot. I am staying with you I am not taking no as an answer.'' I answered and heard a sigh.

He got up and looked at me, smiled.

''Are you still reading that? Didn't you get bored?'' He cleaned his hands with a towel.

''It's not that bad. You should read It too Shin. You will love it.'' I answered, sat up the couch to make room for him.

''Ehh I don't like reading books tho.. What is it about?'' He sat next to me looking at the pages.

''It's about a young man breaking up his family's traditions. And the family is a northern Japanese aristocracy with the influence of Western ideas. You know when he grow up he didn't wanted to work in politics so he broke the chain...''

It was a common thing for me that I get lost while I talk about something I am interested in. But I wanted Shin to read this book because he has a dream to change the delinquent history. I knew he was capable of doing it. I wish I finished the book before recommending him though..

''Nee-chan slow down.. I am interested in how it's gonna end though.. Tell me after you finish it will ya? You know I don't like reading.. Instead just tell me the best parts.'' He grinned and put his arm on my shoulder pulling me in a side hug.

I chuckled. I knew this small head wouldn't read it.. Well at least I tried.

''Yeah yeah I'll..''

He started telling me about the bike he was planning to give to Manjiro on his birthday. He got some of the parts shipped from Manila, Philippines. He was so excited to see Manjiro's reaction. He worked hard and made it perfect for his little brother. His eyes were shining while talking about what parts he changed or made.