alfie solomons loved ailsa shelby like a rotten dog. like his canines were falling out of his gums. like a monster. like a beast. like something not worth loving back.
peaky blinders / alfie solomons
season three ― season five
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CHAPTER THREE: ROTTEN BONES
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ALFIE LOVED AILSA LIKE a rotten dog; like his canines were falling out of his gums. Like a monster. Like a beast. Like something not worth loving back. He never did believe she knew just how his heart ached for her. Ailsa saw him for what he truly was, but she glossed over the decaying edges and burrowed her way in deep. Crawling beneath his skin and bone until she found something worthy of craving. A mere scrap of life. One last unbroken vein where the blood ran red.
He detested it sometimes. He longed to rip her out with his bare hands, to free himself from the weight on his shoulders, if only for one second. But Ailsa was like a rare jewel. She was beautiful, though not overstated. She didn't flaunt her beauty to the world; rather, she kept it for those who valued her most, who loved her not because of it but in spite of it. She was rough but not jaded. She was a ruby in a handful of diamonds, and Alfie couldn't bring himself to discard her along with the rest. No matter how much it hurt.
So he carried a real ruby in the pocket of his coat. Attached to a gold band that, in due time, would end up on her finger.
If he asked her.
If he cowered beneath Tommy Shelby's iron fist like everyone else.
And there was no fucking chance of that happening.
(Maybe.)
(Even Alfie didn't quite believe himself.)
Ailsa's grip on his hand was tight and unforgiving as their car turned into the driveway of Arrow House. It was early in the morning but the sun was, on this rare occasion, sitting high in the sky already. In spite of it, Ailsa felt cold. She had Alfie's thumb moving rhythmically against her knuckles, him wanting to keep her so close that he drove them down the familiar Birmingham roads one-handed. In the backseat was Faith, her hair gleaming like fallen Autumn leaves from where she gazed out the window with her forehead pressed to the glass. It was picture perfect, idyllic. But Ailsa knew what was coming.
Tommy watched the three of them emerge from the vehicle like Jesus staring down at them from the cross. His figure in the window of his office was unmistakable. Faith stared up at him curiously while she waited for her mum and Alfie. He seemed his usual stern self; for someone who was hurt not too long ago. She raised her hand and waved. After a moment, he waved back.
"Why does Uncle Tom look so serious?" Faith asked. She was the picture of innocence in a pleated blue dress that morning. She had her hair pulled back in braids beneath the brim of a large white hat, a silk blue ribbon looped around her neck and trailing down her spine like flowing water.
Alfie smiled at the sight of her, his metaphorical daughter, though his eyes glinted with an emotion that Faith, at her age, wasn't yet ready to understand. "When doesn't ya Uncle Tom look like that?"
