warnings?: spoilers for "plan 99", angst city™, major character death, not proofread
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Phee Genoa was never the type of woman to wait around for anyone, much less a man. Her lifestyle didn't necessarily allow it. Every time she went out on a treasure hunt, to recover a long lost artifact, she didn't always no if she would make it back alive. Which, of course, is not to say she doubted her abilities. She's made it this far relatively unscathed, hasn't she? But, she'd be a fool to ignore that there had been a few too many close calls over her lifetime. It was easier, at the end of the day, to not wait around for a man. She could have friends, she could have relationships. But she was not the kind of person who would play games, to do the "will-they-won't-they" dance. Now, though...She found herself violating that very principle, all for him.
Tech was different than any man she had never met before. He saw the world differently than everyone else. He made her see things that she never had before. And, she hoped at least, she made him see things different, too. The man was always wrapped up in his data pad, analyzing things and forgetting to live in the moment. Unless it was a matter of life and death, of course. But since she brought him to Pabu, she hoped that he was learning to stop for a moment and appreciate the beauty of the world around him. She wanted to share that beauty with him.
Now, she was left wondering if she would ever really get the chance. The Batch had left on a covert mission, had given her no details. When she had said goodbye to him, Tech hadn't made any promises of contacting her. Still, a part of her hoped he might. Or, at least very least, she might hear from the kid.
Something was nagging at her. Something made her feel like something bad had happened. Call it anxiety, call it nerves—but something was eating at her. Phee wanted to contact him, but that might jeopardize their mission. She would never forgive herself if she had done something to hurt him.
So, she sat in her home, staring at her comm, waiting for something, anything, to signal to her that her Tech was okay, that they all were on their way home, that she was being a worrywart for nothing.
That never came.
Beep!
Phee hesitated when she heard her comm. It wasn't Tech, or the kid, or any of the Batch. It was Cid, and that could mean anything. If Cid had found out that Phee had helped the Batch, had found them a home, that could spell the end for any friendly relationship she had with the Trandoshan. But...Perhaps Cid knew something. Perhaps things had gone south on their covert mission and they had to ask Cid for help. Cid could know something about where her Brown Eyes was.
Phee answered the comm, painting on the perfect picture of nonchalance. "Need help acquiring some valuable jewel?" Phee asked, putting her hands behind her head, leaning back in her seat. "I'll have to check my schedule—"
"It's about Goggles."
It felt like a bucket of ice water was splashed on her. She was instantly sitting upright, peering at the hologram of Cid in front of her. "What happened?"
"There was...an incident. I don't know all the details. But the boys came back here, all roughed up. Had an air of gloom hanging over them. Wasn't hard to put two and two together." Cid looked away. "I thought you should know. They're not in a good spot to talk, and...Well, I know he meant something to you."
"I—" Phee blinked quickly. Kriff, she couldn't cry now. She couldn't cry. She couldn't. She tried to distract herself. "Are the others alright?"
"They're being treated by that med droid." Cid looked away again. It almost seemed like someone was pulling her attention away. Phee wondered if it was one of the boys, or maybe AZI. "Look, kid, I don't know if you'll see 'em again. They're not thinking straight. I just didn't want to leave you wondering."
Phee swąllowed hard. "Thank you. I...Thank you."
"Alright, I have to go. But...take care of yourself. Okay?"
Phee nodded, and the hologram of Cid disappeared. She leaned back in her seat, hands rubbing her face. This wasn't what she thought would happen. How could...How could he be gone? He was smart. Beyond smart. He was capable. If there was anyone who could figure out how to get out of a tight spot, it was him. How could her Tech be the one to go?
She thought back to the last time she saw him, right before he left for the secret mission. She remembered being annoyed, ever so slightly, at the time. It had been the middle of the night, and he was just going to sneak off with his brothers and the kid, all without a single word to her. In the back of her mind, she had understood—he wasn't good at social cues, and from what she gathered from Omega, this was an important mission. He had a lot more going on at the time than telling her goodbye.
But that didn't mean she couldn't give him shit for it. She had walked up to him outside of the Marauder, where he typed away on his beloved data pad. She had said, "So you were just gonna leave without saying goodbye."
"That is correct," Tech had said, never taking his eyes off his data pad.
As she had stared at him, he finally looked up, almost sheepish. If Phee had known that was the last time she would ever see him, she would have taken a moment longer to admire him, to memorize his beautiful brown eyes. To commit to memory every last one of his quirks.
Instead, she teased him, like she had always done before. "Well, don't go running off with any pirates or smugglers while you're gone."
"Yes," Tech said matter-of-factly. "This mission should not involve either."
He had missed the subtlety of her words. He often did when he was wrapped up in something. Phee had wondered what this mission entailed, how dangerous it was. But she got no information out of the Omega, and so she knew she probably wouldn't get anything out of Tech, either.
Phee had reached out, pushing his data pad down so he would look at her again. "That's not exactly what I was getting at."
If she could do it again, she would have told him. She would have said that she cared for him more than anything she had ever cared for in her life. That he is the kind of man she wants by her side until her dying days. That he was, is, the kind of man who made her heart sing and butterflies fly in her stomach and makes her question everything she's ever done and ever will do, or whatever else they say in sappy holonovels.
Instead, she only chuckled at Tech's awkwardness, and said, "See you around, Brown Eyes."
Now, she would never get to see his beautiful brown eyes again. She would never get to see the way they lit up when he figured something out. How they sparkled as he rambled about the things he was passionate about. How they softened, ever so slightly, when he looked at her. He had been wrong, all those weeks and months ago, when he said that all clones share the same phenotype. Or, okay, perhaps he was right in the very technical sense. But she didn't love other clones' eyes like she loved her Tech's. He was wholly unique. He was hers.
Only he wasn't, because for all her confidence and bravado, she never did work up the courage to tell him how she felt. She always thought it was the wrong moment, that if she was going to do it, she needed to do it right. She would never get the chance to. He was gone, and he would never know that for all the treasure in the world, he was the only thing that she wanted to cherish.
Phee choked out a sob, the tears falling freely now. Everything she wanted was gone. How was she supposed to go on in a galaxy where Tech did not exist? How was that fair?
"You were supposed to come back for me, Brown Eyes," she whispered. "You were supposed to come home."
