Andley

Part Six

Summary: Andy feels unwanted and mistreated.

~~~Andy's POV~~~

What is heaven? What is hell? Isn't it all just the same? Would I get into heaven if I killed myself? I am so hypocritical. I tell the fans that they are important and don't need to harm themselves.

Here I am locked in the bathroom holding a blade thinking about how the blade would feel against my skin. Watching the blood ran down my arm.

Can anyone save me? I feel unwanted. I don't even think Juliet wants to be with me no more. In all honesty, I don't want to be with Juliet.

I have been struggling with my sexuality believe it or not. I got closer with one of my bandmates. I couldn't believe it either.

I got close to Ashley, but the voices in my head are telling me you're not good enough or that he will never love you. I believe they are telling the truth who would love me?

It's funny growing up we use to believe that monster lives underneath our beds or in the closets. In reality, they are living in our heads, and they can get the best of you.

Monster? Demons? They are both the same. They both will break you down to the point where you want it all to stop. When will it stop?

The question I got to ask myself is when does it stop? I rolled the blade around in my hand. If you are ever in a situation like this stop and ask yourself is it worth it?

I ask myself that every day but the answer always seems to be yes. Try not to listen to him I know it's hard. I have been through it before. Started when I was younger.

I got bullied at school for the way I looked. I tried so hard to be perfect. I change my hair, face, clothes, but did that stop them no. Why? Because I was different.

Now look I am a nineteen-year-old with a band, but yet I can't save myself. I opened my palm the blade laid flat against my palm. A hand reached down and took the blade from my hand.

I didn't flinch. I was happy they did that. I heard the toilet flush and they kneel in front of me. I looked up, and there was Ashley with a worried look.

He looked down at my arm that was cover in scars. I have a few new ones from like a couple of days ago.

He lifted my chin wrapping his arms around my neck pulling me into a hug. I wrapped my arms around his waist, and he ran his fingers through my hair.

"How long has this been going on?"

I stayed quiet. I don't want anyone to pity me. I made the decision; it was a terrible decision. I was depressed and needed help.

"How long?" Ashley asked again.

"Ever since high school," He grabbed my arm planting kisses on my scars.

"Please don't ever do this again," If only he know how hard it is not to.

"If you ever feel the need talk to one of us," I nodded.

"We care and love you, Andy," I smiled and nodded.

"Thanks, Ashley," He smiled and helped me up.

~~~The End~~~