The Darker Universes

Exchange of Goods (Part 2)

TW's: miscarriage, trans stuff, blood, panic attacks, drug use, sexual assault recovery

((there, ms. therapist, i wrote the thing. and yeah, i do feel a bit better now. could use a hug though.
sorry to project on you manny; i didn't have a choice either. i wish this had a happy ending. maybe one day i'll write you one.
heed the tw's on this one))

Manny had to wait three days before he could get out to the store to get what he needed. There had been the dinner... that was a fiasco. He hadn't talked to Savannah's friends much. Even while completely zooted, he wasn't in a... great mood after what had happened just hours prior. And then he'd... yeah, he lost his cool. It was kind of a mix of everything coming together; what had happened with Jaime, Woody getting picked on, that Ocean girl being a total bitch, getting called by... that name. He would've beaten the shit out of Elmer if he could've. Instead, he took it out on Dim, who had nothing to do with it. He still felt horrible about it. Especially after...

No. That wasn't something Dim wanted to talk about, so it'd be better just to store away that night. Wait for his brother to open up. Like that'd ever actually happen. He, Dim, and Woody did go to the store, which was exactly where he needed to be, but... he couldn't exactly get what he needed with his brothers around. Even if he stole it, if he got caught by either of them–no, that wasn't a conversation he ever wanted to have, with anyone, let alone his family. He would have to wait a bit longer. It was still good if you took it a few days after, right? It would have to be, because the next day was the school trip. That had been fun. It had helped him take his mind off things, at least. But the next day, right?

Five days. Nearly a full week after the incident, he'd finally been able to get what he needed. He hadn't been able to work up the nerve to ask any of his family members for some cash. He was a bad liar; he knew that about himself. If they asked, and he couldn't lie convincingly, they'd assume he was gonna spend it on drugs.

If only it were that simple.

Easy enough to swipe. He was actually in the right mindset to do it carefully, taking it out and leaving the box buried in the trash in a bathroom stall. Took it quick, and that was that. Five days. That was... fine. It would be fine. Things had to be fine.

And things were fine after that. If anyone knew anything was up, they didn't say anything. He was in a better mood; not just him pretending to be happy, but actually happy. He still flinched when touched unexpectedly, especially if they touched his neck or wrists. All he could imagine was that belt, wrapped tight, pinned against the bed while–while–

He was sick often. Too many bad thoughts. Bad memories. He would hold down his sick until he was alone since he didn't want anyone to worry about him. Most assumed he liked being the center of attention, and that was only partly true. Sometimes, he needed to be seen so that he could be assured of his own existence. Too many years on the streets, overlooked and ignored by passersby. He wanted to be seen, would sometimes act out just to get the attention he craved. But other times, he faded into the background as much as he could. He got less talkative then. That was noticeable.

"A-are you, okay?"

He'd brought Woody up some breakfast. The other had come back from a nearly week-long hunting trip late that night, and Manix had assumed his brother wouldn't be up to eating with everyone. He had assumed correctly. They shared their breakfast in the attic instead. Manny looked up from his plate. They were both seated on the floor, Manny pressed against the wall with his knees drawn up. He probably looked tired. Very much unlike him.

"'m fine. Why?"

"You, um... haven't ea-eaten, much."

Manny rolled his eyes and shoved a piece of turkey bacon in his mouth despite not feeling hungry at all. It was another sick day. He had had bad dreams all night; not just about the latest incident, but all the ones before it. He hadn't gotten much sleep.