just in love with you

The player (2)

Here I start from where I left !!! I was left stunned or speechless to think what heck what I have just heard he was the biggest player boy they said and some of random girls told me that the guy was saying I don't Chase girls I already have left few if I do need a girl I think I will keeping changing the girl' in a entire week or can play with three girls heart Okey that was frustrating for me I mean what I expected he was a not that my opposite he was the worst worst boy in this damn planet Earth.  This was what I heard I mean not even a most handsome boy will say like that but my stupid heart' never gonna listen everything whatever I heard was just a rumour truly. They were saying because there didn't get the attention of him the way I get uffff!!! That's too much I mean yah! Girls just hate him because they can't get him and other girls hate him because of his look and personality.  But , whom is going to taught me the bad boy was really bad because I was just in love with him. The pain of one side love is only I know and though I tried so many times to lose feeling and thinking to focus only to myself but when I go home and look at the mirror I felt crushed because I wasn't good in any my whole life sucks . There are  some life circle where we just hate hate yourself I can understand . But I was always comparing myself throughout my whole school life is only went on comparing myself to other even I tried so many tips to accept that I am a Dumbo head mind girl . Let's talk about him so as in love I still care and like him as him that's how I passed my 2 years only looking and liking him and leave. The other liza me is crushed into pieces and dark although what my face don't seem like that!!  please never judge anyone through there face it's hurt a lot and people are blindly judging and say things that you are hearing for frist time which I also doubt that  . As not as every one I lived without any passion or profession until an incident happened that is harsh for me to even think about it I guess I was even bullied by teacher that sounds rude but yeh! I was being considered poor girl and having sponser. But I am sooo belated to have a sponsor atleast it  helped my family a lot through this you get to know I am a poor middle class girl. From every hurting things I experienced the one and only sentence which effect me a lot to choose medical..yeh !! I am a medical student who got a dream to wear that white coat and with stethoscope. Big dream thanks to that fucking teacher the moment was like one day suddenly my sst teacher stand me up and asked me a question asked what you want to become in your future!! And I wasn't sure what to become at that time and only thing which comes in my mind that time was (Doctor) that word slipped from my mouth which I wasn't even sure about that and the her face was like a student like you want to be a doctor kinda suprising expression she had and asked why you want to become a doctor!!? Which I was about to reply that I love there work but before I could say a single word she continues saying oh! I see I know why you chose to become a doctor before in your childhood time you play doctor doctor game and you are still playing that weird game still !! Sit down next !  That just stopped me for a min my heartbeat stopped and shock that she just insult me for choosing to become a doctor and I still remember that moment that is an unforgettable for me life long I mean how stunned and embarassed I felt and all the classmates laugh at me in that  small age me it was too much shocking for me because that's what I experienced for the Frist time!! And later I sat down and come back home after school and I sit there thinking what I have just feeled of what she said to me and I search about doctor and there work and I was surprised to read those then on that time I determined myself I will show you ma'am myself in that white coat and stethoscope and saying how is your health that was what I said to myself and determine to choose medical stream. Some how I bare all the things which were happening to me . Yeh but I never complained I just keep this whole thing to myself only struggling and those anxiety attacks are painful. But my plot twist happened....