How to Get A Gym Bro For Life (A HaiNen Story)

Chapter 2- Acceptance

I slumped down into bed, staring at my ceiling in thought. Riki Nendou, why couldn't I get you out of my head? It's so weird.  Was I that desperate to get him to join the tennis team? No, there's something more to it, but I can't place my finger on it.

I reached over to my bedside table for the dinner my mom worked so hard on, but couldn't bring myself to grab it. What is going on? I couldn't work out on an empty stomach, but something was physically stopping me from grabbing the bowl. Could it be...? No...it couldn't.

I sighed again, turning on my side. Guess I wouldn't be going to the gym tomorrow either. Why did I ever rely on my friend anyways. I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt, but I can't just keep letting him hold me back. Do you think Nendou would blow me off if I asked him to go to the gym with me? Why do I even care?

I tried to sleep, but images of him passed through my head. Stop it! This is wrong! I shouldn't think of him so much! We're just friends! Just friends. Oh what's the point in thinking about it? It just makes my head spin.

A soft knock on my door caught my attention. It was Mina, the poor girl was probably worried about me. 

"Come in Mina," I called, still staring at the ceiling.

"Hi big brother," she said, "Why are you being so weird?" I don't fault her, little kids are naturally blunt.

"Just thinking," I shrugged. She stared at me from the open door frame.

"Mommy and daddy think you have a secret girlfriend," that statement felt like a punch to the gut. Way to not listen to me mom, "Can I meet her?"

"Agh! No! You've got it all wrong!" I said, shooting into an upright sitting position. I felt my face flush with embarrassment, "I don't have a girlfriend!"

"Oh," she said, "Do you have a boyfriend?" My felt my blush grow nearly as dark red as my hair.

"It's not like that I swear!" I said, "I'm not gay! Besides, what would mom and dad think?"

"I don't know," Mina said, "But can I meet him?"

"I don't have a boyfriend!" I said, "I'm not gay!"

"Oh," she seemed a bit upset, "Sorry."

"No, it's okay Mina, I shouldn't have freaked out," I apologized, "I just, there's a lot on my mind. I had to cut off an old friend because he's been taking advantage of me."

"Oh, that's not good," she said, "Do you want to be alone?"

"A little yeah," I smiled, ruffling her long maroon hair. She got up and walked away, closing the door behind her, but I don't think she realized I could hear her through the walls.

"No mommy! He wouldn't tell me about his secret girlfriend!" I chuckled a bit, but went back to wallowing in self pity.

"Ugh, why is it such a big deal?" I said to the sky, "Why do I care so much about one person's involvement in the tennis team?" Because it was him. As my rival, he was supposed to be the one who convinced me to go above and beyond my limits. If only he could see how hard I was working for him. Would he be proud? Would he congratulate me? Would he convince me to work harder? Stop thinking about him so much! It's like a schoolgirl with a foolish crush!

I rolled onto my stomach and pulled out my phone. I opened the search engine and started typing at the little keyboard.

"How to tell if you have a crush on someone," I watched the millions of search results show up. I opened up a link to some random romance advice blog. It looked pretty cheesy to be honest.

"If they seem to be stuck in your head, even when you're not trying, you may have a crush on them," it read. No, the way I think about him is purely from an appreciative standpoint! Not to mention he's my rival, I can't let him down! Again, what would everyone think if I was gay?