the parachute

I hate this

I looked down at it tilting my head.Two sighs escaped my lips, then a grunt, then a scream,then a groan and I probably look like I'm taking sh*t right now so I should probably stop. I took another look at the plastic figurine and decided subconsciously that this was probably the best time to start ranting,why? I have absolutely no idea.

- you look like you're having the best time of your life,while i feel like complete sh*t.i really do.Because today was supposed to cheer me up and it ended up ruining my mood even more.

You want context don't you?Yeah you don't ,you probably give two sh*t's about what i'm about to say but i'll talk regardless.Alright listen up.So... i screwed up this huge job interview and ended up not getting it.To cheer me up my "friends'' .I snorted .more like plastique fake sh*ts...no offense to you...even though you are actually real plastique... but  you know what i mean right?

What am I doing?

Anyway i woke up late and none of them thought to come see if i was a actually dead or alive .I arrived twenty minutes late because i took a wrong turn and when i finally get there, they already f*cking jumped and left me hanging, so i jumped in a hurry, without thinking about safety or if the parachute was correctly attached,i just went head straight in , like a idiot..and then i started panicking because the parachute wouldn't launch so i thought i was gonna die that my life was over but then it launched... too late ,i made a horrible landing and after fighting the annoying parachute drapes and getting out of that endless hole, I realized I ended up in a forest, in the middle of nowhere and I am now crouched over talking to a lost power ranger figurine about my life issues...

How did this thing end up here anyway?

I got into a sitting position and straightened my legs looking up at the deep blue sky.Two sighs escaped my lips.

at least i landed on land and not in the ocean or something

After what felt like hours,I felt my stomach gurgling,then I heard it grumbling and after that the sound just got unbearably loud,so I swiftly got up taking the figurine with me.

-you're my traveling companion now,so you better not betray me.i warned it,another sigh escaped my lips.

what am i doing?

i started walking farther into the forest,still with no sense of direction.looking left and right,calling out names like a mad man.until a little farther i arrived at a camping site.there was smoke so the fire had just recently been put out and a small greenish,yellowish tent

original choice of colors...

i looked around a bit more there was a talkie walkie and a radio...A RADIO, i rushed over to it and started pushing random buttons but all i heard were statics sounds.A few minutes later i was fed up so i started hitting it cursing and calling the damn thing names,until i heard a voice behind me a familiar voice...my own voice,i did a quick u turn with my head to find myself staring at...well...myself.

-the f*ck are you?last time i checked i don't remember having a twin brother.i asked,i was either hallucinating or i had officially lost my mind...they're both are the same either way.

-maybe you should check again...i mean he sounded creepy ,i was starting to wonder if i sounded the same way when i talked to people especially women,who knows maybe that's the real reason i'm still single.the worst part about this exchange was that he was holding an ax in his hand,

i don't know about anyone in this situation but this  right here is a beautiful well defined red flag!

I started backing away slowly from the radio tightly gripping the power ranger in my left hand and he was coming towards me with THE creepiest smile i have ever witnessed in my life including in horrors movies.his entire teeth were showing,they were slightly yellow but all of them were straight and flawless .Compared to me his olive skinned face was a bit more tanned than mine and he wasn't as handsome as i am.

-i am hungry...he suggested, you look like food.

-so you're a cannibal?i demanded still backing away

-yeah...i guess.

-cool,cool so um dude i'm gonna leave you to your business and i'll just leave.my footsteps became a bit more hurried.

-no don't leave.you should join me.

-i'm good thanks

-i think you should

-i don't eat with jeffrey dahmer's children,so f*ck off.i closed the discussion turned around and hit a sprint.i could hear his heavy breathing and mine i knew i would pass out but i ran,i ran without stopping ,without looking back and i didnt' stop until i was finally out of these woods.i made it out on a huge road and blacked out.after a little while i woke up in my bed in the hotel safe and sound.

It was a dream or more like a nightmare.a realistic one.very realistic

I got up, put some clothes on and started heading towards the hotel buffet,when one of my friends joined me.we started picking out food.

-ready to go parachuting?he was almost squeaking like a little girl at this point

-huh?what...Yeah.i replied completely distracted,thinking about that weird dream-or nightmare

at least i'm smart in them

I sighed again or...for the first time today.

-dude you still aroused or something?

-what?

-Yesterday,you came back to the room, high man.

–what are you talking about?

-i don't know bruh you kinda look crazy...by the way you came back with this...

i looked at the hand he was stretching to see a small plastic figurine

it was...a power ranger...the one from my dream and the exact one at that

-what the-

 END,FIN, A5IRAH