We made it to the hospital, Chad was still in surgery, he had over 19 stab wounds and the guilt was eating me alive.
I just went to see Mindy in her hospital room because she needed medical attention as well.
Then went back to the waiting room.
Sam looked over at me "whatcha thinkin about?"
"What's not to think about?" I replied
"True, I'm just worried about you, and I'm really sorry."
"Sorry for what?"
"For all of this this is my fault." Sam said
"I've told you over and over Sam this is not your fault, it's not like you can help where you come from." I said as I reached for her cheek "Whatever Billy Loomis did has nothing to do with Sam, I've said it once, I'll say it a million times, and I love you."
"I love you too" she said
We hugged and then I blurted out
"I'm sorry if i seemed bitchy, feel guilty about Chad."
"Why?"
"It should've been me." I said and I looked up at Sam, she looked horrified
"Listen, I love Chad too Tara, and I know I could never wrap my head around how much you love him, but he's more durable Tara. If that was you you wouldn't have survived, I'm sure he doesn't regret it, don't feel guilty...he saved you."
I understand why Sam would say that, it's me we're talking about, and we all know how over protective she is.
"Look Tara if you died today, I wouldn't be able to live with myself, I wouldn't want to." She said
We sat in silence until a nurse came out. I stood up quickly.
"Chad is doing great, he's awake, he asked for Mindy and I let him know she's asleep. He wants to see you Miss Carpenter." The nurse told me.
I walked to his room to see him watching a cartoon. Looney Tunes.
He smiled when he saw me and I sat on the space he had in his bed, at least I'm small enough.
"Hey." I said timidly
"Hey." He said smiling at me
"How are you holding up?" I asked
"I've been through this before I'm doing great." He said
I couldn't believe how nonchalantly he spoke about it, but then again he's traumatized too, maybe that's apart of it.
"Why did you do it?" I asked looking at him.
He turned his head and looked at me
"Do what?"
"What you did for me, you- you fought back and you almost died in the process...over...me."
I looked down fighting tears
"Because I love you and I didn't have a choice...there was no way I couldn't and even if there was a choice I'd do it again because when you love somebody you make sacrifices."
I love you...he said I love you, I didn't expect our first I love you to be under these circumstances.
"I love you too I just- I feel really bad, I thought I lost you forever and I almost lost my mind."
He held my hand
"You have no reason to feel bad."
"Everyone is risking their lives for me. I mean, Mindy she lost Anika and...I still have you and I just feel-"
"All of us feel terrible but the reality is, it's not our fault Tara, we can't control this. I almost died for you once I'll do it again if necessary."
"Let's hope there is no AGAIN" I said and kissed his cheek."
"We can only hope." he said
After that we watched a few cartoons until he fell asleep and I moved to the couch (I didn't wanna kick him in my sleep or anything) and then I went to bed.
Author ( never written before so this is probably really bad)
