The Life Of A Victim

<3 THE FIRST LIE OF MANY <3

I'm running far, far away from this place, where they can't find me. I turn around and then she's there, heavily breathing, standing with a broken wine glass. She starts running my way and the ground crumbles underneath my feet. The ground is now gone

I woke up in a cold sweat. The birds chirped, and the smell of fresh bacon came to my nose. I walk down the stairs to the kitchen, and my mom is in front of the stove, making my favorite breakfast, bacon, eggs, and French toast. "Good morning, sweetie," she said with a smile, "Ready for a new day?" "Yeah", I said, rubbing my eyes, still trying to wake up, "Breakfast smells amazing, Mom" "I made it just for you, honey, it's a special day," she said, bringing the plate of fresh french toast with the eggs perfectly fried to where there is still yolk coming out. The bacon was cooked beautifully. I sat down at the table as she walked over bringing the pancake syrup, and kissing the top of my head.

She brought her food and coffee over to the table and sat across from me. I didn't wait for a second longer to start eating. My mom was saying grace as I had syrup dripping off my chin. "May God bless this meal and this family for years to come, Amen" she said, I followed by saying "Amen" with an egg hanging out of my mouth. I finally finish chewing the food that I had inhaled, I wiped my face with a napkin, "Sorry." I said. She stared at me with her hands still clasped together and her jaw dropped, she was just shocked that I had eaten almost all of my food already. "Grace, we use our manners when at the table" "Right," I sighed, looking down at my plate "Sorry, it's just- never mind" "Grace," she said in a worried tone, "Honey, are you okay, I'm worried about you, are you eating?" To be honest, I wasn't. I barely ate and when I did, I felt so sick. So sick to the point of throwing up. I try to put on a smile as I say "Yep, 3 meals a day" Her eyebrows lifted, "Oh, thank God, I just want my little girl to be alright" "I am, Mom. I'm perfectly fine" I lied. I felt so horrible to lie, but she couldn't know I wasn't taking care of myself. It would hurt her.

You might be wondering why I am doing this to myself. When I was younger, I was bullied because I was a little on the heavy side. People would constantly make fun of me, calling me names like 'Porkchop' and 'Beefy'. Those words got drilled into my brain and I thought that if I stopped eating, I'd be skinnier. So I stuck to that goal, less food is better. I eventually lost the weight, but the habits didn't stop, I think that if I ate something, I'd gain all of that back. "Grace" my mom waved her hand in my view, I didn't realize I zoned out. I finally snapped out of it and she looked even more worried "I'm okay Mom" I said, assuring her. I couldn't hold the barf in anymore.

I got up from the table to go throw up. I locked the bathroom door behind me and started barfing up my breakfast into the sink. My mom knocked on the bathroom door, "Grace, sweetie, are you okay?" she asked "Honey?" I finally finished barfing my breakfast. I went to the bathroom door and opened it "Oh, honey" she says, holding my face."I'm okay, it was just a stomach bug, but I feel better now" I say, backing away from her "Now if you will excuse me" I motioned my hands to signal her to move out of the way. She said nothing after that, just silence. I went into my room and got dressed in a baggy T-shirt I've had since 4th grade and leggings I got at Walmart. I brushed my teeth again, grabbed my bag, and headed out the door. I walk to school because it's close to my house and I don't want my mom to hear the mean names people call me. As I get near the school grounds of Evelyn High School, I hear the sharp voice of Katelyn Michelle. The name just sickens me.