"It's so very difficult to feel loved by you..it's all I wanted from you."
"That might just come at the cost of marrying someone whose life revolves around monsters."
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Raine Kennedy, an African American Federal BA, is new to the married life, ob...
As exiting the vehicle I notice a figure standing outside up against the cafe's brick exterior.
My heart begins to then pump pretty fast as I feel my eyes light up. I walk a little closer in hopes he notices me.
"Aye." I say aloud, making my presence known.
He looks up to find my eyes. He gives a small smile. I walk up immediately placing my arms around him, going in for a hug. After a moment, he gives in hugging back.
He's obviously not a fan of physical touch. Crazy we've been together almost 6 years and he's yet to still show that kind of affection a lot toward me. Some things you accept and just settle for.
He embraces me just a little tighter after being there a few seconds taking a deep long sigh.
"Hard week?" I whispered in his ear.
"Oh how I've missed you. You're such a breathe of fresh air." He says quietly.
I smile placing my hands on his cheeks. I gather on the tip of my toes becoming tall enough to place a small kiss on his forehead.
"Let's eat yeah?"
He nods letting go then opening the door for me.
"Window seat?" I ask.
"Perf." He replies.
So sarcastic. I love it. ——
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It was silent a few minutes. We both agreed to give ourselves comfortable time to gather our thoughts before conversation for better communication.
"You look like you're dying to ask me something, so shoot." He says then taking a sip from the drink he got.
"...are you okay? You seem tired?" I ask.
He smiles, "always that. But yeah I'm okay."
"I'm guessing nothing you can really talk to me about. Don't want the president's secrets to be slippin out anywhere. Y'all are Bestie boos/4lifers right?"
He looks at me irritably. "Ight..damn bad joke. My fault."
"You always give me attitude when I leave like that for long periods of time." He says staring me with a blank expression.
"Oh sorry, I forgot my the person who is my husband, is a husband that goes off the grid a lot without me never knowing what's going to happen to him. Silly me for not being okay with that enough."
"Raine." He gives me that desperate look asking for me to understand his predicament.
I sigh. "I know Leon. But for goodness sake, can you like not get a break- it's been like this 4 months straight. We almost had to literally RESCHEDULE our wedding. Not only that, we got no honeymoon..AND NOT ONLY THAT EITHER, I can't even get a phone call telling me you're okay. I'm sorry, it just gets me a lil ugh because I have to walk on a path of constantly never knowing everyday, which is fine, just it's a lot."
He gives a sad expression and leans across the table placing his hand on mine.
"It's just for a little longer, then time will free up." He says quietly.
I cackle. "Hun. They've always taken advantage of your hard work and energy because you've allowed them." I say raising my voice. I clear my throat gathering myself back. "Sorry..I didn't mean to get louder. I just feel lonely."
He sighs. "I know angel. I hate I'm like this."
"What do you mean? It's not you...but you know if you'd let me help..which I even got clearance for, we'd be able to see each other more-"
"Absolutely not." He says sternly going back to that cold expression.
"You're going to get wrinkles lookin' at me like that man."
He eases it back. "Work the job the right way, those are apart of the paycheck." He replies.
I giggle.
It goes back quiet again as he checks his phone.
"I have to head back in a min."
I nod. I hate the little time I get with him is what I look forward to the most. Then when I get here, I get so irritated with the fact this is all I get for right now.
"Will you at-least be home tonight?"
He glances down, yet to say anything. He can't lie to me. He knows I'd know. I mean for goodness sake, it's my job to point out liars.
"I see. Well knoxy boy and I miss you." I say quietly trying my best to smile. Knox is our Doberman. Leon took him in as he was pretty much failing at passing to become a service dog:')
"I'd do anything to be home with you right now." He says loud enough to where he knows I'd hear him clearly.
I get up from my seat.
"I know, my love. I'll be there waiting." I say walking toward the cafe's exit to the catch a taxi back to headquarters.
