Pink Pansies ✺ A Pedro Pascal A.U.

Chapter 16: The Monthly Sickness

I was beginning to understand why people in LA are so protective of sunny days.

As someone who loved to live in sweaters and relished the sound of rain because it meant candles, curry and a good book, it was rare for me to feel bitter when the sky was blanketed with that unfamiliar gray. But today I was acutely aware of the negative correlation between the weather and my mood.

The rain had been on and off for weeks, and currently showed no sign of relenting. I could hear the tinkling transform into pounding then into a steady stream throughout the night. The perfect recipe for interrupted sleep.

It didn't help that I noticed the unwelcome splotch of dark red on my underwear when I went to the bathroom at 4 A.M. My body had sent the signal and I had to break away from my daily timed routine of birth control to give myself a period. There was no way I was going into work, never on the first day. I had to email my supervisor and those who were scheduled to run the gallery to inform them I wouldn't be in. They were usually understanding but with the big exhibition coming up I had a feeling they'd ask me to work remotely.

To top it off, I'd have to let Pedro know I wouldn't be able to make our date. It had only been a few days since my drunken Facetime call, but something seemed to switch. Not in a bad way, things were just different. Like it wasn't as nerve racking to talk to him. Maybe it was because I was starting to believe he didn't just want to sleep with me. There was a deepening, but it could also be attributed to the fact that we mainly communicated via text and voice memo.

He had been planning something fun apparently, and texting me obscure things and asking random questions when he had a bit of free time. It was fun, but I wasn't in the mood for fun anymore. I wanted to curl up in a ball under my blankets, retreat from everyone and everything and die alone like an old house cat.

As if he knew I was just thinking of him.

Pedro: Hey Emi, what are your thoughts on edibles?

It made me laugh, almost made me want to respond but I had other things to attend to first. In the search for my heating pad I heard my phone buzz again. I was irrationally irritated.

Pedro: Hey Emi, do you prefer listening to French or Japanese?

I unconsciously tilted my head in curiosity. What kind of question is that?

Emi: music?

Pedro: No, just the language.

I put my phone down, annoyed even though I had no real reason to be. After finding my heating pad I made myself a cup of hibiscus tea and got the Motrin from my cabinet, then prepared to let my work know I wouldn't be in.

—-

Most of the day had passed and luckily I was given the time off. I think the weather inspired a lack of motivation in many of us. I spent most of it trying to sleep and failing, settling for watching trash entertainment on my computer while I lay in a puddle of self-defeat.

My phone buzzed again and I saw Pedro's name. The pain I was in served as a temporary memory blocker, and I forgot to let him know I wasn't feeling well.

Pedro: Do you still want to go out tonight?

Guilt washed over me. He was excited, and his effort was endearing even when I wasn't in the mood for it. Texting was too much effort, so I decided to call him.

Pedro: Can I call you back in thirty minutes? I'm in a work meeting.

I sent the thumbs up emoji despite the action being very uncharacteristic of me.

Thirty minutes later my phone rang. I watched the screen for a couple of beats, dreading the conversation we were about to have before finally sliding the green button across the screen.

"Hey" I answered.

"Hey," he replied hesitantly, "everything alright?"

The sound of his voice was soothing despite his potential confusion. I missed him. My previous thoughts about his messages and even about this phone call quickly dissipated. All I wanted was to be with him.

I sighed, "I'm so sorry Pedro. I'm not going to be able to make it tonight."

"Oh," he paused, "Can I ask why?" There was a twinge of sadness to his voice as he spoke.

I cringed at the thought of telling him, but did so anyways. "I've come down with the monthly sickness."

I could hear his laugh on the other end.

Prickly and guarded, "It's not funny, I'm in a lot of pain." My reply came out more terse than I intended.

"You're right, you're right. It's not funny." He calmed himself, "I just thought," he paused "I don't know."

"What?" I asked, annoyance clear in my voice.

"That you didn't want to see me. Again. Like ever."  It sounded like expressing the thought took a small weight off of him. I could see why he had laughed but I still didn't like it.

"Don't be ridiculous." I scolded him but the corners of my lips twitched in a smile.

"I was relieved! That's why I laughed." His tone was defensive even though I could hear him chuckling.

"Yeah, well, I'm sensitive and irrational right now." A pout formed in spite of the fact that he couldn't see it.

He hummed and something about it felt sweet and understanding, "Anything I can do to support you?"

His question took me by surprise and I stayed silent as I contemplated asking him for what I really wanted.

Pedro's voice came through, "You don't have to answer now, you can let me know. I wish I could talk longer but I do have to get back to work."

"Ok." A bit deflated.

"But listen, I'm glad you canceled because it means you're taking care of yourself today. You deserve that."

"Hey Pedro?" I asked, suddenly motivated by the fact that he'd have to get off the phone soon.

"Yeah?"

"Would you be willing to come over?" my heart started to race in my chest. Immediately I judged myself for asking something so needy and there was a slew of negative thoughts that followed. I tried not to give them any weight, it was just period brain.

"Like now?" A combination of surprise and excitement.

"Maybe." I smiled, and I could hear him laugh again. "No, like whenever works for you. You don't have to answer now, you can let me know." I repeated him.

"God dammit Emi." He sighed in that all too familiar way that let me know he was having a hard time restraining himself, "I'd be on my way now if I could but I do have to work. I'll text you when I'm off, okay?"

"Ok." I couldn't help the grin on my face. "I'm kind of gross though, hope you don't mind."

"Never. Talk soon."

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I know I promised smut but I was really feeling cozy playful Pedro vibes rn, (and I'm also dealing with the monthly sickness lmao kms) but I'll probably put some smut in the next chapter. I'm also thinking that because this is short (also bc I wrote it in like 30 minutes) I might go back and edit a bit, but if I do I'll make a note in the next chapter!

Thank you SO much to everyone reading and commenting and sending messages about how you love the story! My lil heart can't take it!! I appreciate you all so much!!!