𝗮𝗹𝗺𝗼𝘀𝘁.

fifteen.

   I have nothing in my room besides a bed, which I can't lift. I turn back to my window, slamming my palms into it before trying to kick it through, nothing working. Just as I'm about to try my fist I hear a gunshot.

   I drop to the ground below the window, pressing my back against the wall. More gunshots go off, so many I think there must be a thousand.

   Then there's silence.

   Another gunshot fires at a proximity that makes my heart drop, they blew off the lock to my room. The door creaks open and I look up to see Joel, his face relaxing at the sight of me.

   I jump up and run to him, wrapping my arms around his torso, "Joel! Where's Ellie? What happened?"

   He shushes me, "it's okay, I'm going to get her now. Just stay here and I'll be back."

   I trust him so I slowly back away, Joel shutting my door again. It's only a few more minutes before I hear gunshots again, my heart pounding in my chest.

   I count in my head to thirteen 58 times before I force myself to stop.

   I stand and slowly pull open my door, stepping out into the hall. There's dead men everywhere. I slowly walk past broken glass that pierces my bare feet over to the stairs, finding a man that had been slashed across the neck.

   My mind flashes to the man I stabbed.

   I can't help it, I throw up.

   Once I wipe my mouth I continue up the stairs, searching floor after floor for Joel. I know that he's responsible for this yet I can't bring myself to care.

   I only think, has he found Ellie yet?

   I make it to the seventh floor and this is the worst one yet. My feet ache and my stomach churns. There's dead men everywhere I turn. Blood is splattered across the hallway and I try and keep my eyes straight ahead as I search for Ellie and Joel.

   Before I can take a step forward someone grabs my ankle.

   I look down, a bleeding man grabbing at the ends of my gown as he groans, "help me, help please."

   I shrink away, my eyes going wide, "I-I..."

   A gunshot sounds and he is silenced, falling to the ground though not before leaving blood stains on my white gown.

   I look up, Joel in front of me with a gun in his hand and Ellie in his arms.

   I can't help but breathe a sigh of relief.

   He shifts Ellie's weight to one side, holding out a hand for me as he tucks his gun away. I take it with no hesitation and we walk together to the elevator, the doors shielding me from the atrocities Joel has commited for me and Ellie.

   It makes me think of what I would do for him.

   I don't answer the question as the doors slide open, letting us out into a garage. Joel leads me towards a car, stopping as a voice calls out to him.

   "You can't keep her safe forever."

   We turn and find a woman with a gun. I recognize her voice from earlier. She was the person trying to make a cure.

   "No matter how hard you try, no matter how many people you kill. She's gonna grow up Joel, and then you'll die, she'll leave. Then what? How long until she's torn apart by infected or murdered by raiders because she lives in a broken world that you could've saved."

   I look up at Joel, his hand tightening around mine, "maybe but it isn't for you to decide."

   "Or you. So what would she decide? Cause I think she'd want to do what's right. And you know it, it's not too late."

   This woman's right, Ellie would sacrifice herself in a heartbeat if she knew she could save the world from this. Save us.

   "Even after what you've done we can still find a way, leave Ellie with me and you can go with the girl. We'll find another doctor and she," her eyes shift to me, "can be the first person to take the cure. You could save her."

   I suck in a breath, looking up to Joel again. His eyes flit to me for a fraction of a second before he releases my hand. I can't even fathom it as he shoots the woman, turning to me right after.

   "Go get in the car," he orders.

   I open my mouth to respond, blood pooling inside of it instead. It drips down my chin and to my already dirtied white hospital gown as Joel stares at me, wide eyed.

   He nearly drops Ellie to the ground as he scrambles to put her down, then lowering me not far from her.

   I was shot in the chest, right in the center.

   Joel tries to put pressure on my wound but it does nothing and tears flood my eyes.

   I'm scared.

   I'm not ready.

   But I don't have much of a choice.

   I think of Henry and Sam. I think of the funny old couple we met in the woods. I think of Tommy and Maria and their baby. I think of the horses Tommy lent to us.

   I think of Joel and Ellie.

   I choke on the blood pool in my throat, Joel helping me sit up to cough it out. I push his arms away from me as he tries to urge me to stop fighting him but his words fall on deaf ears, "Joel, J-Joel!" I choke.

   Once I finally manage to quiet him I wipe at the blood dribbling from my mouth, "Joel, Joel, t-thank you."

   He freezes.

   My voice trembles, "tell Ellie that- that I'm sorry."

   Joel chuckles, his eyes glazing over, "Athy, I'm not- I'm not your messenger."

   He begins to choke up as I break into another coughing fit, my ears ringing. My thoughts scramble and I feel the pull to just let go.

   "No! Dammit! Athy!"

   "Joel..." I trail off, my voice losing itself as I feel my limbs relax.

   Then, I can't feel anything.

   I am dead.