Bruised Peach

PLANNED PARENTHOOD

I sat in the waiting room nervously looking at all the pregnant women around me. I gulped holding my stomach, hoping that wasn't me after today.

"Jayda Hall!" I heard my name making me snap From my thoughts and quickly stand up. I followed the woman to the back and to a room. "The doctor will be with you in a minute." She stated before closing the door behind her leaving me alone.

I looked around at the the pictures, diagrams, and babies feeling more nervous. Me and Mike had a pregnancy scare before but nothing ever actually happened. He was persistent on trying to make a baby, even when I didn't want to. Sometimes I thought that getting pregnant would turn our relationship around. That maybe if I was pregnant the abuse would stop, the rough drunk sex would stop, and maybe he'd be nicer period.

I glanced over at the counter seeing the urine cup sitting on it with paper towels under it.

I wasn't new to this so I grabbed it walking into the personal bathroom they already had inside the patient's room. After peeing I placed the urine sample inside the metal slot and washed my hands.

It always felt like a hundred years when waiting on a pregnancy test. Mike being beside me in all of this would cool my nerves but he had to work like always. Although we fight I couldn't sit here and say that I was ready to leave him or that I was done with him. Mike was just misunderstood and trying to be like Scoop so bad that he even started treating me like shit. The abuse didn't start until he thought that I was sleeping around. I use to bartend at one of the hottest clubs downtown but he got jealous at the money and attention I would get.

He would try to drop hints about me quitting or saying he'd take care of me jokingly. That turned into sitting at my job to make sure I wasn't flirting. We got into it so much at the bar about guys and even women that he got kicked out the club and me fired. He hates being made a fool of so when we got home he threw all my things out into the yard. All in front of the neighbors trying to "show me how it feels" to be embarrassed when he was the one who did it to himself.

I heard a knock on the door before the nurse came in. "Hello!" She said in a friendly tone making me smile and wave.

"So your pregnancy tests results are back in and congratulations Ms. Hall, you are six weeks pregnant!" She said clapping with a smile on her face.

"Wait-. I'm pregnant?" I asked touching my stomach feeling my heart sink. "Yes ma'am, I'll give you some time to register it all. In the meantime I'll give a few maternity doctors phone number." She said before leaving me.

"God please help me." I whispered feeling the tears roll down my cheek as my life flashed before my eyes. I've always wanted a baby but I was sad thinking about the way things are between Mike and I. The last thing I wanted to do was be one of those moms on the news and shot behind a man who couldn't control his anger. I knew I had a lot to think about and to consider but for now I felt like the secret is best safe with me.

_________

I walked into the house feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. Quietly I dropped my purse on the couch knowing Mike was taking a nap before work.

Being a mom was a scary idea but getting rid of my baby sounded even scarier. Maybe having this baby will give me the strength I need to leave but then again a child shouldn't be used as my crutch. I pulled my phone from my purse going to my contacts until I ran across Eve's number. She always knew what to say but I knew this wasn't a conversation for over the phone. Eve was there for me in some of my lowest moments with Mike. Her energy is so refreshing, she's understanding, compassionate and protective of her friends. She was everything and that's why I had to pull back, things were becoming too hard to ignore.

We were in the same swamp of shit and besides Eve is only bi curious, I'm hard up bisexual.

I heard boots coming down the stairs making me quickly put my phone down. I knew I wasn't doing anything sneaky but he'd swear I was down here texting some nigga. So to avoid arguments I stayed off my phone around him most of the time.

"Hey baby." Mike said rubbing sleep from his eyes kissing my forehead. "Hey." I said softly watching him go to the wash room to grab his clothes. "Man I gotta pull these twelve hours again, I can't wait till I'm off this shit." He said looking down referring to the ankle monitor. He violated his parole and served eight months in jail and was put on house arrest when he got out. Of course dealing was out the picture so he was left getting an actual job and he hated it.

"Three more months baby." I said making him nod. "Yeah you right, I'm miss you tonight!" He said disappearing into the kitchen making me smile. He was so full of shit but his lies sounded good.

Everything in me wanted to blurt out the news I got today but I still wasn't sure. "Have you seen my badge? I had it on the table earlier." He asked buttoning up his shirt. "No, have you checked the bathroom? You're always leaving it in there." I asked standing up to look for it too. I walked upstairs to the bathroom seeing it laying on the towel.

When I picked up the phone it lit up showing that he had a message. He was still quiet downstairs so I decided against better judgment to be nosy. I furrowed my eyebrows clicking on the number immediately seeing nudes. A bitch with her ass poked out and a few titty pictures, I shook my head feeling the tears stream down my cheek. I scrolled up reading messages feeling disgusted, he was bad mouthing me to the girl and from what I could see they had sex at least twice.

"Jayda!" I heard his voice trailing up the stairs but I was so angry I couldn't even respond or pull myself together. After all I've been through with him and now I'm pregnant and find this shit? I was ready to crash out.

"Jayda." He said again busting through the door looking caught and breathing heavily like he knew I was going through his phone. "Who the fuck is Bria Mike? Who the fuck is she!?" I asked smacking him all across his face and head making him cover up.

"Jayda! Stop!" He yelled gripping my wrist tight and twisting them until I couldn't swing anymore. "Why the fuck you in my phone? Hm!?" He asked angrily shoving me at the wall making me look shocked.

"I don't go through your phone so don't touch my shit!" He got in my face spitting making the tears fall harder. He didn't even care about me finding out he just didn't want me touching his phone. "Stop fucking crying bitch!" He said pushing me making me push him back as a reflex.

"Oh yeah?" He asked getting in my face making me turn my head. "Mike, please stop!" I said trying to push him off but he kept getting closer. "Push me again." He said clearly ready to swing next. "Just leave me alone and go to work! You don't love me anymore and I can't force you to." I said trying to move as little as possible.

"Cause you make that shit real hard, a nigga ain't got shit cause of you!" He screamed punching the wall behind my head making me jump up in shock before bursting into tears. He walked off slamming the bathroom door behind him. He blamed me for his living conditions when really it was because of him. Accountability was like a virus Mike couldn't catch.

I took a deep breath placing my hand over my stomach feeling comfort. It was starting to seem like I had to choose my baby or Mike and Mike was making it too easy to see life without him suddenly.

Let me find out Ms. Girl finally starting to see the light? I hope she makes the right decision and stick to it

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Excuse mistakes....