Coffee Incident

Chapter 9

Laurie

As time passes by, little by little napapansin ko lahat sayo. I love the way you smile and the way you say my name...It sends shivers down my spine. How your eyes turn to slits whenever you laugh. Every time you strode your way towards me in a closed space, you steal the air out of the place. I keep on saying na this might end the way I imagined and that I should fight whatever this I'm feeling, but at the back of my mind, I know I fell in him in the deepest and it's too late to climb the surface.

I think I won't be able to fight this feeling in my chest anymore.

We've been hanging out for months and Jacob was consistently such a whole damn forest. He's such a gentleman, always in all ways. He's making it harder to resist him. He was slowly caving in my great walls, it's scary. I know the risk is drowning, but I'm gonna take it. 

I decided to fix things with mine first before ko siya sagutin. It's likely possible na my parents would do everything to make me obey them pero I'm not afraid anymore. I'm gonna fight for my love. I'm gonna fight for me and Jacob.

I'm having dinner with my parents, I wanted to talk about the wedding. We were eating silently, only the sound of the utensils were heard. After eating half of the food on my plate, I decided to finally talk.

"Mom, dad." I said after clearing my throat.

"Yeah? " My mom responded with her brows slightly raised.

"I'm really sorry mom, dad. I-I don't want to push through the wedding. I-I I don't think I can bear living the way you guys are. I want to marry someone that I actually love and who loves me too. I tried really hard, trust me I did. I tried to fight the urge to be vocal about what I feel and just do what you want but, hindi ko pala kaya mom. Dad, I don't want to live with a man who doesn't love me and who I don't love." I said then looked down at my plate. 

The silence stretched for a while and I was expecting a harsh backlash. I expected the worst honestly, days ago. 

"Okay. Thank you for being honest anak." My father said in a gentle tone.

Nagulat ako sa sinabi ni dad kaya napatingin ako sa kanila ni mom. My mom had this small smile darted at me. I was so surprised that no words were coming out of my mouth. 

"What-I uh" I struggled to form a sentence.

"There's nothing we can do Laurie. If ayaw mo then why would we push it? " My mom said.

"We thought you were fine with everything kasi hindi ka naman nagrereklamo, but thank you for being honest. Please bear with us because this is our first time as parents too. I know it's too late to make it up to you but let me start with saying sorry." Mom said.

My dad stood up and gave me a tight hug, he whispered 'i'm sorry' and 'i love you'. My mom followed and also gave me a hug. She kissed the top of my hair while patting my back gently.

All this time, all I had needed to do was to be honest. 

May pagkukulang din naman ako as anak nila, our feelings are valid. I understand where they came from. Hindi madali ang mag-asawa ng hindi mo mahal. Their marriage were arranged and so is our situation, so I understand that they're also trying. 

It's not too late. Familial love is supposed to be regal and knows no bounds. It means that it's great and eternal. So is my love for them. Mahal ko sila despite what they did. Tao lang din naman sila, let us cut them some slack too.

I called Jacob and told him I wanted to see him. Natawa ako kasi I heard things clacking, parang may mga nahulog kakamadali niya mag handa. 

He fetch me using his car and he was wearing that stupid hot smile that literally makes me weak on my knees.