The Lost Harrison Twin

Chapter 17: I Can Explain

Asher's POV
     Savannah ran past me sobbing going straight into our room. I look at Ben and then I run after her. I look all over the room and I don't see her. I look in the bathroom and no Savannah. I then look in the closet and I see her in the fetal position sobbing her eyes out.

     "Baby you okay?" I squat down and rich my head out to touch her.

     She flenches back and eyes widen as if she is a stray dog that doesn't want anyone near her. "RED RED RED!!!" She gasp out. I pull away and stair at her in shock she has never used the safe word and now she was. I put my hands in the air backing away and seating down a good distance from her.

     "It's okay baby." I whisper. "Just take deep breaths." I say trying to couch her through this. It seems and feels like forever before I got her to calm down. Well sort of calmed down. "Can you tell me what happened?" I ask in a soft sweet tone but she shakes her head no. "Okay sweetie we can just sit here and chill just keep breathing. Everything is okay it's just me and you in here. You're safe."

     She puts her face into her arms that are resting on her knees and sobs. We sit here for what seems like ages. She finally whispers into her arms "He is just like her."

     "Who's just like who?" I ask.

     "Jason...." She sobs out. "He's just like my Mom."

     "Aw baby what happened for you to think that?" I ask and she just shakes her head sobbing. I grabbed my phone out of my pocket and went to text Jason to ask him when I saw he had already message me.

Jason: Please let me explain. I keep it a secret because of her past but it's not what it seems.

Me: What happened?

Jason: She walked in and saw me taking medicine. Look I would like to tell both of you what's going on but I want to do it in person.

Me: Come up here I can't get her out of the closet.

     Jason had gained my trust over the past few months and if he says he can explain I believe him. Sometimes Savannah will shut down without seeing the entire picture. I hope that was the case this time. Her being around family that actually cared for her was healing her and now I am scared that we are back to level zero with her.

     Jason came in and sat down next to me in the floor. "Savannah....."

     Her head shoots up and her eyes as red and puffy. Her checks are pink but stained with tears. She stares straight into Jason's eyes and hers fill with fear.

     "Savannah listen it's not what you think. I should have told you but with your past I didn't want you to have anxiety. I didn't mean for you to see and I guess not telling you back fired." He sighed and pulled something out of his pocket. "I am a diabetic, have been since I was ten. I usually have an insulin pump however it broke last week and I can't get a new for two weeks. So you saw me doing it the old fashion way by giving myself an insulin shot." He holds out the insulin bottle to show her.

     She stares at it processing everything he just said. "It..... w-w-was that?"

     "Yes honey I am nothing like your mother I promise. I might have a drink or two here and there but I don't do drugs. I hate what your mom put you through and if I knew for one second about you and what was going on you would have been with me. I should have told you, I just want to protect you. I see such a strong and capable girl however I feel like you're so fragile too. I need to remember how strong you are and trust that I won't break you when telling you things. I am so sorry honey."

     She nodded her head not taking her eyes away from him. "You're not like her. You're not like her." She chanted over and over as if the more she said it the more it convinced her. After a few minutes you could see her face change. It went from a scarred hopeless little girl that was stuck in her past to a confident strong women. She took a deep breath and stood up. "Excuse me, I am going to go shower." She said as she walks past us going into the bathroom shutting the door.

     "I will see you all later. Message if you need anything." Jason says getting up and patting me on the back.

Savannah's POV
     I felt like a shell of a person at this point. I slide my swimming suit off and get into the shower. I feel numb as the water hits my skin. I felt exhausted and stupid. I felt so stupid! I hate that I overreact to things and I shut down. It's like my body takes over and my mind becomes clouded. If I would have just let him explain then I wouldn't have caused so much stress with all of us. I sometimes feel so hopeless and so week.

     Why am I so broken? Why can't I be like everyone else. None of the other littles would have freaked out that bad. I feel hopeless.

     I sigh as I was my hair my mind going a mile a minute about all the issues I just caused. Who cares about my past I need to get over it. Right? But how could I? I needed to figure it out I was sick of being so scarred of everything.

     Once I was done I got out, wrap a towel around me and walk out to the bedroom.

     "Here I got you some clothes." Asher says as he points to the bed. "You okay baby girl?" I nod as I grab the clothes and slip them on. "Okay well let's take a nap so you can wake up refreshed." I nod and climb into bed once I am done. "Can I cuddle you?"

     "Please." I mumble, I need to feel his strong arms around me. It makes me feel safe and like it will all be okay. "I am sorry I am broken."

      It was silent for a second and then he flipped me over. "Baby girl you're not broken. Have you been through a lot? Yes. However, that doesn't make you broken. It makes you the complete opposite. You're so strong! You're the strongest person I know it's one of the many things I love about you." He kisses my forehead and squeezes me tight. Then we sit in a comfortable silence until I drift to sleep.