The Life of Ebony Ibre

Chapter 9

 THEY'LL NEVER BELIEVE ME 

Horrid delusions... that is what filled my night. Horrid delusions that not even arousal could help me escape. Now they haunt me in the light of day as horrible memories. That venomous voice and mock-filled laughter echoes in my head; the sting from that mortal grip still lingers on my throat; and the sight of deadly intent dancing within glowing eyes is an image unwilling to fade...

This is why I am in the garden, doing such frivolous work as picking flowers for bouquets. It would be more ideal to do something practical that my mind could label as productive. But I simply don't have it in me today. As long as those memories remain, I don't have the courage to walk under the canopy of the walnut trees, or open the iron gate to Mother's flower garden, nor even face her observatory.

Frivolous tasks – that keep me far away from everything that's considered my normal routine – are the only thing that can distract me and keep the memories at bay. Frivolous tasks, such as,.. picking flowers for bouquets.

I felt the slightest touch graze my skin, which directed my gaze downward to see a leaf resting on my hand. I looked up at the massive tree, providing me shade and witnessed the leaves stir as birds came and went.

"That must of been the cause of it." I reasoned, sending the leaf off with a breath. My gaze remained on the little leaf as it drifted away, right up until it mingled and disappeared in the sea of green. The tree's peach blossoms were past full bloom now, producing beautiful peaches, unlike in my dream, where they were still flowers. I was glad one of her branches stretched to my window. I could take a few for a snack later.

My smile faltered and face grew dim with the dark thoughts of my dream. Gradually, a breath entangled with fear released from my lips.

"It appears that even the simplest things from my dream will cause the memories to appear."

I covered my face with a hand and laughed at myself as a tear left my eye.

"Look at you!" I mocked. "And you have the nerve to want to be the Guardian! How can you fight against spirits and demons when your aura isn't even strong enough to withstand a bad dream? It's pathetic! Sad really... To be so afraid of something that didn't even happen."

But it was true. I was afraid and have been for two years. I was always worried that one day Father would summon me to inform that he's found my replacement. However, after two years of not finding anyone, I had started to think that perhaps I had a chance. But after this dream... maybe I've just lying to myself. I played with my fingers as I wondered about the dream's meaning.

"Could it be that he found a replacement while I was gone?"

It was then I remembered the promise Father made to me on the train: to reveal the new development taking place in our home. It's odd that he's been keeping secret for months... Before, it was more so out of curiosity that this "new development" had caught my interest, but now I wonder. Could my dream be connected to it somehow? Ever since Father told me about this "new development", I didn't stop thinking about it. And though I fell asleep multiple times during our journey, it was only when I went to sleep in the house, that the nightmare came.

I looked up from my thoughts as the dreadful possibility of my dream seemed to be coming more of a reality. "Has Father really found a replacement? But how!? When!? I thought... I thought he was going to give me a chance to prove myself!"

"I haven't been given my chance to prove myself!"

I spoke these words unintentionally, and it was much louder than I would have liked. But the longer those words lingered in the air, the more I felt the words Father spoke in my dream.