Chloeheart's Anecdotes

May 2015

May 28, 2015

            La douleur exquise. La douleur exquise. La douleur exquise. She kept on repeating those words. She thought no words can explain what she feels, but then she found them, expressing every feeling she can't put into words. It hit her hard as she understood its meaning. The phrase completely described her current state. It was not your typical heart-breaking story, it was heart-wrenching. She always had unrequited love, but this time it was too much. She wanted him so bad. She knew she could never have him, but still, she wanted his affection more than anyone else's. It is painful, nonetheless, she loves him.

May 29, 2015

            She was exhausted. She was like a tightrope walker, balancing while juggling on a fine wire. She tried to do both but she failed. The balls she was juggling started to fall one by one, and then she fell too. She tried to balance her priorities, but in the end, every one of them failed. She did her best but she though no one really appreciated it. She was too tired of everything happening around her. She was too tired of leading. She was too tired of all the petty arguments her friends are having. She needed a break, a break from all of these. She needed a time for herself, a time to indulge on her hobbies. All she needed was a hug, a hug from him.

May 30, 2015

            She was in her early 20s yet she has not experienced it; she never tried confessing to anyone. She already liked and loved a handful of guys but she never confessed to any of them. She preferred to keep it to herself, because for her, it is better not to risk anything. She was actually afraid of confessing because she does not have the strength to do so. She is pessimistic when it comes to love, she always think that the only love she is capable of is unrequited love. She always dreamt of mutual love but deep down inside, she knew she would only be rejected. She always thought of that to all the guys she ever loved. She is afraid of rejection. She does not want to be rejected by him. She does not want to tell him what she really feels. She does not want to tell him that she loves him very much, because deep down inside, she knew what he would say.

May 31, 2015

            Her summer was worth it. She was supposed to be staying at home, watching Korean dramas and playing her favorite online games, but instead she chose to take summer classes. She did not like the heat of the sun, but she had no other choice but to walk the pavements of the campus to attend her classes. She predicted that her summer would be boring, but like any fortune-teller's divination, she was wrong. It was during her laboratory class when she noticed him, sleeping like their professor was not there. She stared at him as he slept; thankfully their professor was only talking to the white board. He suddenly opened his eyes while she was staring at him. She did not notice she was already smiling at him. He smiled back and she panicked, she lost grip of the pen she was holding. The pen rolled to him and he willingly picked it up and gave it to her. She felt blood rushing to her face, she was blushing. She took the pen and stared at her blank notebook instead. That was the day she had a crush on him. That was the day her summer started to become worth it.