Officer Down

Miles of cars, full of people with nothing to say

"Mrs.James I just wanted to let you know that the casket is almost here if you need to prepare yourself." The priest tells me. I had been crying, and screaming for the past two days just hoping what happened wasn't true. Ben ended up dying on scene, and was brought to the hospital to confirm cause of death. I nod, and say "Thank you but I don't think I can prepare to see something like that." "I understand. I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. The church will be praying for you, and your son." He tells me. I cock my head before asking "What do you mean? I don't have a son. Ben, and I never had the chance to have kids." "My mistake ma'am." The priest starts saying "I must have heard wrong."

"We gather here today to honor the memory of Sergeant Benjamin Andrew James." Was all I heard the priest say before I zoned out looking at Ben's casket. Sitting next to me was all of Ben's teammates from plying football in college at Ohio State with the Buckeye's. Sam Hubbard, Nick, and Joey Bosa, and Joe Burrow all wanted to give speeches. As Nick is called up he rubs my arm, and gives me a slight smile. He takes a second to look at the flag draped alter before walking up to the alter. He sighs before saying "Hi everyone I'm Nick. I uh- I went to college, and played football with Ben. My brother, Joey, and I were always the victims of Ben's endless rants, and vents about this gorgeous girl that he had just met in his Physch class, and how he had to get her number, and was praying that she didn't have a boyfriend. He asked her out, and within the year he asked Emma to marry him. When I asked him why he asked her so quickly, or why he wanted to get married so young all he did was smile, and say when you know, you want to get down on one knee the second you can."

"Are you doing okay?" Sam asked me as he grabbed my hand. We were waiting on the chief of police to give the signal to dispatch to send out Ben's last call. I nod, and say "No but I will be." I look at the chief, and just nod. He slightly nods, and says "Dispatch your go." I take a deep breath as I hear that familiar scratch of the police scanners flood the room. "Officer 0715, Sergeant James." The woman at dispatch says. It's quiet before she continues "No response. Officer 0715 is a 10-24. Sergeant James may you rest in peace. We've got it from here brother." I burst into tears, and collapse into Sam's arms.

I was able to collect myself as I watched two of the officers in dress blues move towards Ben's casket. I took a deep breath as I watched them pick up the flag that draped over Ben. Ben always told me that if I ever came to this moment that he'd be with me in the second fold of the flag representing eternal life. He wanted me to know that he was always with me. As the I watched them fold the flag I recognized one of the officers. He takes the folded flag on his arms, and walks towards me. I tear up as the man kneels in front of me, and presents the flag to me as he says "On behalf of the entire department we are extremely sorry for your loss." "Jake?" I asked in tears as I took the flag into my arms. I clutch onto it as he nods before going back into position with the other officer. I burst into tears as I held onto the flag in my arms, and leaned on Sam. Sam rubs my shoulder as the twenty one bells started.

"Ben." I whispered to myself as I watched the procession drive away, and to the cemetery. I still hadn't taken a finger off of the flag. I stood in the parking lot of the funeral home until I felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked over, and saw Joey standing there with Nick, Joe, and Sam. "Ready?" He asks me. I nod, and start walking towards our car to go to the cemetery.

*Time skip*

"Come on Ben. Give me one more miracle." I begged as I sat on the bathroom floor with the small plastic test in my hands. When I flipped it over the word "Pregnant" filled the small screen in tiny, bold letters. "Oh my god." I said as I held the test in one hand as I started to cry. "I love you Ben. Always, and forever." I whispered as I looked up at my ceiling.