Hale's

Chapter 12

"Oh, hey," Hale said a bit uncertain. "I got some... stuff that I need to do." And with that, she disappeared into the back of the shop just as the man she had been talking to got up and turned around to face Jonathan.
It was Rafael.
Jonathan blinked two or three times, just to make sure.

For a minute or two, they just stood there in silence staring at each other. Rafael looked so old... No. So grown up. Obviously – they hadn't seen each other in 12 years, but... Rafael had always looked so young and wild. Now he looked so... un-wild. His crazy, spiked up, black hair was gone, replaced by a rather ordinary haircut that didn't suit him at all, according to Jonathan. He looked so normal. So unlike him, and yet so... attractive.
Jonathan wanted to slap himself. This was not the right moment to be thinking about such ridiculousness.

~*~

Rafael's throat was dry and he felt as if someone had placed a tremendous weight on his chest that made it difficult to breathe. He was so angry at Jonathan, he couldn't even think straight. On top of having been dumped like that, he was now furious that Jonathan had raised his child. Not that Rafael had wanted to do that, but still; he would have liked to know at least.
Then he remembered that Jonathan might not even know it wasn't his child... But still! Even an 11-year-old had figured it out – Jonathan should have paid better attention! And now he had the nerve to send him flowers?!

"What are you doing here, Rafael?" Jonathan interrupted his angry brooding that suddenly converted to sadness as he heard the harsh tone.

~*~

It hadn't been Jonathan's intention to sound so rude, but he was so upset it had come out all wrong.

"I uh... I got your flowers," Rafael said awkwardly.

"What flowers?" Jonathan asked confused.

Rafael frowned a bit. "The flowers you sent. The ones you used to have in our garden... Roses, lilies, gardenias..." He searched through his jacket for something and then handed him a few of the gift tags they placed on their floral arrangements, sometimes with personalized notes if the sender wanted to add something, though these were empty.

His stomach twisted painfully as he slowly put two and two together. So that was what Hale had been up to. The blue diary Hale had had. It was the notebook he had always written all his stuff in, including all the flowers he had planted in his garden.

Rafael cleared his throat awkwardly, giving him an expectant look.

"I didn't send these," Jonathan said abruptly.

"What?" Rafael asked in disbelief. "Your d- that girl there," he pointed to the back of the store, "said you had sent them."

So he knew. "Yes, well, she lied. She sent you the flowers, not me. I'm very sorry you had to come all the way down here," he said in a rush, walking over to the door and opening it. "I'm afraid that was nothing but a silly child prank – I'll make sure it doesn't happen again. I'm very sorry. Have a safe trip back home." He gestured at the door, hoping Rafael would get the hint.

Apparently he did, because he slowly walked out of the shop, looking confused and... sad? Why was he looking sad? Did he regret having left him...?
Whatever, it didn't matter; Jonathan didn't have time for this. Okay fine, he had time, but he just didn't want to do this anymore; Rafael had ripped his heart out once, he wasn't about to make that same mistake again.

"Take care of yourself, Rafael," he said quietly as he closed the door, shutting him out of his life.

Rafael didn't attempt to say anything, so Jonathan locked the door, unwilling to see any customers at the moment. He had to talk to Hale.

~*~

Rafael stared at the locked door, unsure what to do now. Jonathan had kicked him out... It was more than obvious he wanted nothing to do with him, so what could he say? Should he try to change his mind? Fight for him? But for what? Jonathan had made it very clear already 12 years ago that he wanted nothing more to do with him, so what was the point now?

The letters hadn't been from Jonathan, but from... Rafael's daughter who had used Jonathan as an excuse to meet him... No wonder he hated kids...

Crestfallen, he stalked back to the car that was parked in the same spot as before. "Let's go home."

"What happened? Did they tell you anything?" Wesley asked concerned, through a mouthful of sandwich.

Rafael sighed, shaking his head. "Wendy died ten years ago. I just want to go home. There's nothing here for me."

This was all too much for him. Too many feelings, too much information, too many memories. Seeing Jonathan had just reminded him of everything he had once had but lost, and it took all his self-control not to break down in front of his friend whom he wished hadn't come with him.
He knew that sooner or later he would have to deal with the Hale-issue, but right now he couldn't. Right now he just wanted to go home and die in peace.

~*~

Angrily, Jonathan slammed the door to their apartment above the store and stalked into the living room where Hale gave him an apprehensive look.

"You're grounded," He snarled furiously.

"What? But-"

"Until you die!" Jonathan almost yelled. "Hale, how could you? What were you thinking?!" He placed his hands on his hips, glaring down at her.

"But you said you still liked him!" She defended.

"That doesn't mean I wanted to see him again! How could you send him flowers in my name? The ones I had in a garden when I lived with him! You got that from the notebook, didn't you? Where is it?!" He demanded fiercely.

"But he liked them!" She argued again.

"And who the hell paid for those three bouquets?" He shrieked, just now remembering this fact.

"I did... from my allowance," she mumbled quietly.

Jonathan stared at her, suddenly feeling his anger vanishing. "Why?" He asked quietly. Hale barely got any allowance because Jonathan couldn't afford it so that must have been an entire year's allowance for her.

She gave him a sad look and a weak shrug. "I read in your diary how much you missed him and how you felt about him, so I searched for his address and sent him the flowers you always used to give him back then, since obviously you were too coward to do so...."

Jonathan sighed, running a hand over his face. "Hale... I haven't written anything into that notebook in almost 10 years... That doesn't mean anything anymore."

"Why not? You wrote it about him, didn't you?" She asked confused.

"Yes but... that doesn't mean I ever wanted him to know. Rafael made his choice-"

"It was a stupid choice. Maybe he regrets it!" Hale interrupted him in exasperation, throwing her hands up.

Could that be...? No way... But maybe...? Did he truly regret it? Did he still want to be with him...? What was that sad look when Jonathan had sent him away? Was that why he had come? No wait... He had come without even knowing because the gift tags didn't have his name on it... So basically he had just shown up because he got random flowers from an unknown person and wanted to know who it was... Right?
But what about his crestfallen expression...?!
Jonathan was going crazy.

"Ugh. I don't know, Hale..." He sighed. "I just don't want to get involved with Rafael anymore..."

"It's not like you have to marry him!" Hale objected. "At least not right now... You could get to know him a bit first," she added with a hopeful smile.

He gave her a dry look. "Right."