Karma is Red - lestappen

chapter thirteen: Fourth of July

The hospital asked should the body be cast
Before I say goodbye, my star in the sky
Such a funny thought to wrap you up in cloth
Do you find it all right, my dragonfly?

- Fourth of July

Max Verstappen

I wake up to the sound of glass breaking. I jump up and get up into bed. Charles is not next to me. I quickly get up and put on Charles's jogging before trying to find the source of the noise.

I leave the room and head into the living room. I find Charles curled up on the ground, kneeling and breathing quickly.

I let myself fall next to him.

I'm not saying anything, I know it's an anxiety attack. I put my hands on Charles' knees as he raises his head.  I watch the tears roll down his cheeks and pass my thumb under his eyes to retrieve his tears as they come out. Charles must have struggled to breathe normally so I lean against the couch, still on the ground, and he sits between my legs.  His back glued to my torso that rises quietly. I put my arms around him to hold him against me and put my head against his back. Putting small kisses on his shoulder blades.

The crisis finally calms down and Charles falls back, resting his head on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry.

- Don't apologize for something that's not your fault."

I'm tightening my arms around Charles. And slip my face down his neck to breathe his perfume.

"I can't sleep when you're not here.

- Then let's make sure I'm always here."

I put a kiss on the Ferrari driver's neck and I feel him shivering against me.

"Will you explain to me what's going on? I'm asking gently. Charles sighs against me.

- I haven't always been like this..."

I keep Charles tight against me while he talks. He puts his hands on my arms. And leaning more against me.

"Since Papa left, I think about death every day. I feel like... every time I see someone close to me, it might be the last time. I'm afraid of losing the ones I love, it haunts me. I don't enjoy anything anymore, I have nightmares where my friends, my brothers... have accidents... I... I'm going to be older than Jules at the age of his death soon and it hurts..."

I feel Charles is holding back from melting into tears. I gently kiss his shoulders and neck to show him that I'm here.

"Your father was great.

- Yes, he was. I miss him every second and I think about him all the time. I didn't get enough of the time I had with him. There are memories with him that fade..."

My heart is breaking and yet I am not the one who lost a person who was my life. We all know that Charles is suffering from the death of his father, but I didn't think that after more than five years the pain was so fresh in the driver's mind.

The pain remains, the memories grow old.

We remain for a long time on the ground in silence.

"I broke a glass in the kitchen...

- I'll take care of it."

I keep Charles one last time against me before I get up. I pick up the pieces of glass and throw them in the trash.

"Do you mind if we get ready for a run together?

- Aren't you afraid that we will be seen together?

- We were already seen together last night and frankly if rumors are circulating just because we were jogging together people are crazy."

I lock myself in the bathroom. Charles lent me a sports t-shirt and shorts to go running as I only had my party outfit.

I rinse my face and brush my teeth. I suddenly notice the mark on my neck. Shit. I know very well why it is there.

I think back to last night. The way Charles slipped his mouth into my neck. All these new sensations. I feel my cheeks warm at the memory of this contact.

I quickly put on Charles's t-shirt. It carries his scent and it's incredibly comforting and pleasant. I take off the jogging that I took from him when I woke up to replace it with the shorts.

I step out of the bathroom and Charles stares at my body with a smile.

"I love seeing you in my clothes."

I smile softly. We leave his house to run.

Charles Leclerc

The feeling I get as I run next to Max wearing my clothes and my mark on his neck is power. I feel like I'm strong by his side. I'm proud to tell myself that he's the one I'm driving crazy.

When we get home, I lock myself in the bathroom to shower and then let Max take over.

While he showers I look at my phone. Pierre sent me so many messages.

Pierre Gasly
What the hell are you doing in a bar like this??
I asked Max to pick you up.
Pierre sent you the link of an article
*Charles Leclerc and Max Verstappen seen running together in Monaco*

I quickly look at the article which says nothing special but then I see the photo. You can clearly see that Max is wearing my clothes and has a hickey on his neck.

Shit if Max sees that he'll probably be pissed off.

Besides, the concerned leaves the bathroom shirtless, wearing only the black shorts that I lent him.

I literally devour him with my eyes. He approaches me smiling.

"Do you still have alcohol in your blood?

- No why?

- Good, because I've been holding back from kissing you for too long. "

My heart stops as I suddenly remember last night.

Max walks over to me and runs his hands under my t-shirt on my hips without looking away from my eyes. I could die here right now.

He slowly approaches my face but the moment our lips come into contact everything suddenly accelerates.

I feel the tension rising along with my desire.

Suddenly, Max pulls his lips away from mine and slides down my neck. I can feel his tongue against my skin and it's the most amazing feeling.

I shiver as I suddenly feel his teeth on my skin. He takes a hand off my hips and puts it on the back of my neck while he continues to nibble the skin of my neck. I don't know what to do with my body anymore. I only feel Max's hands and mouth on me and my breathing is a little too heavy.

Max slowly pulls away from me. I watch him back away, passing a hand over his mouth to wipe it. He doesn't take his eyes off my neck and smirks.

"Now we're matching."