Your scars remain

Chapter 9: Oh you wanted fluff?

The chapter in which I adamantly deny myself rights to write my favorite traumatized brunette being happy

Putting my main fic on Hiatus because of lack of ideas so now I can focus mainly on this one :D

Anyways
TWs // Panic attack, Hurt No Comfort, torture, nightmares, slight blood, yeah this chapter's heavy

Karl locks himself in his bedroom as soon as the reasonable opportunity arises. Well, not locking himself in exactly, sure the door had a lock and Master- Sir- Phil told him he could use it whenever he felt, it just felt wrong. All he did these days was close the door. That alone had been enough to flood his mind with anxiety.

Luckily it didn't feel as wrong as the first few days here.

Tommy was excited about some ring that arrived in the mail that day, and said it would 'Block my em paths powers so I can touch others without digging in their memories!' whatever that means. Wilbur was out of the house, probably as Quackity. Techno was also gone, but he's not sure where. Master- Phil was watching TV while on his phone(? The foldable book thing).

They wouldn't notice if he was upstairs, right?

Karl didn't notice he was swaying on his feet until he almost fell over. He steadied himself as quietly as possible and wobbled over to his bed where he curled around Robin, the shark plushie Eret gave him, and buried his face into their soft fur.

He sobbed, stuffing muffling his cries and fur soaking up his tears.

There had been a few nights like this, where he couldn't hold back the tears that constantly wanted to fall. He's not sure as to why it happens, just that sometimes he couldn't take it anymore.

Karl, after a few minutes, finally managed to calm himself enough to shakily pick up the panda notebook to write his daily letter to Pandas.

⇀↼⇀↼⇀↼⇀↼

Dear Pandas,

I'm sorry I'm really sorry. I should have followed you and made sure you were okay and now your dead and it's all my fault.

I wish you were here. I wish I wish I wish.

Why is my breathing so wrong? It feels

I feel

I no

Help me Pandas please

For the first time in forever I feel like my head's above water, like Master Phil and Tommy and everybody is pulling me up and I'm scared what will happen if they let go? I know it will happen eventually

It█has to right?

I need to focus oh honk why███ the tears keep coming

Please just ████████████████

███████████

█a█l

⇀↼⇀↼⇀↼⇀↼

Karl shakes as another round of sobs wrecks through his body.

Tears are already smudging the page, making the last words unreadable.

Karl gasped. Why was it so hard to breathe? He shakes uncontrollably.

He couldn't see-

What was happening?