Desirous [H.S.]

Eight

HEAVY TW: domestic violence

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ANASTASIA HALL

DECEMBER 17, 2009

❦ ❦ ❦

I giggle softly at my phone, a wide smile growing on my face as I watch the cute video Harry sent me. Even being two hundred miles apart, we still find ways to connect with each other, and Harry knows that funny dog videos are always the way to my heart.

"What are you doing?" Johnathan asks abruptly, making me jump.

I didn't even hear him come in, nor do I know how he got in. You have to have a key fob to get into the dorms.

I click my phone off, and tuck it under my leg. "Nothing," I shake my head, forcing a smile.

Lately, Johnathan has been making it very clear how he feels about my friendship with Harry, and I feel terrible about it. Harry has been my best friend for almost five years, and I don't want to lose that, but Johnathan is my boyfriend; it's a very fine line I have to walk.

He walks slowly up to me with narrowed eyes. "What were you looking at?"

"It was just something Harry sent me," I explain, swallowing harshly.

I've been trying so hard to keep my friendship with Harry separate from my relationship with Johnathan. I still haven't told him about the kiss on the roof on the night of graduation, and at this point, I don't think I ever will. Johnathan has a temper, and I don't even want to think about what would happen if he found out.

"Anastasia," Johnathan sighs, pushing my hair off my shoulder and softly stroking my cheek with his thumb. The action isn't warm, or comforting; it causes an anxious feeling to build in my stomach. "What did I tell you about this?"

"I know, baby," I nod, averting my gaze away from his intense stare. "But it was just a little video."

He shakes his head in disapproval, clicking his tongue. "You know I don't want you talking to him anymore," he states, shifting his hand to the back of my head to stroke my hair.

"Johnathan, please," I whine. "He's my best friend, there's nothing going on between us."

"I don't believe you," he tilts his head, a smirk growing on his face. "I've seen the way he looks at you."

"I- I don't know what you mean," I breathe, feeling a lump grow in my throat as I think back to my last night with Harry.

"Ana, I love you. Please don't leave me," he begged, pulling on my hand as he shuffled towards me on his knees. "I need you."

"But I love Johnathan," I cried, using my sleeve to wipe my damp cheeks. "This isn't fair to him."

"What about me?" He pleaded, his eyes welling up with tears. "You're my best friend, I love you. Please don't go."

"I know you've been fucking him," Johnathan spits, lacing his fingers in my hair. My eyes widen at the accusation. "And I don't want you speaking to him anymore."

My lips part in shock; Harry and I have never done anything close to that, it was only the one, drunken kiss.

"I would never do that to you," I shake my head quickly. I attempt to stand up from the bed, but Johnathan tightens his grip on my hair to yank me back down, making me wince in pain at the action.