Fuck my life or fight for my life?
Hmm...Good question.
At first I thought I was doing well. Everything was great... But your behaviour and words have taken so much from me in a while.
Energy, focus, sleep, and tons of tears. I remember being so tired, trying to sleep after hard days at university, and listening to all your problems over and over again.
Of course I was there for you, I was always ready to listen to you. I cared a lot about you because at that time you were my everything.
Until I couldn't take it anymore.
I just couldn't sleep... At that moment, I was just thinking...
Is it even good for me to have you in my life? Is it right to continue? Should I take a break?
I haven't done anything for so long. I was just a living shell, dead inside... and to be honest, I thought I made the right choice. I didn't want to admit it.
Until one day. I came home and lay down on my bed. And my head was so chaotic and empty at the same time.
I was unable to do anything. My eyes were filled with tears. After some time, they came out naturally, freely like waterfalls.
Fuck my life!!!
Fuck
My
Life
!!!
Maybe that's when I realized I wasn't going to be an idiot. I should fight for my life. I have to stop this, right now. No more sleepless nights. No more waterfalls of tears.
I prayed. I prayed so much that I would have the strength to stop it all.
Now, after a few months, I am free as a bird and God has put a smile on my face. I am happy now.
I'm fighting for my life
