Someone

5 years

I started loving you at 15yo.

Today i'm 20yo. I'm not a kid anymore. Let someone like you crossing my heart was a terrible mistake. I know that I couldn't forget you so easily however it's been 5 freaking years.

Everyone's says " you need time to forget your first love". My first love lmao .
I never told him that I liked him nor had a date with him. Maybe it's my way to dream about him whenever I want to, it's sometimes made me sick since I cried over a relationship that never even begin.

-Writing this made me laugh cause who the fuck does that. Crying for a man that I never dated. -

Deeper that I could ever thought, I was delusional about this pretending romance. I wanted to feel love and someone's caring me.

- Sounds like what my mom and dad are doing actually hehe. -

How many times I cried for him ? I can't count.
A lot is the correct answer I guess.
I'm ashamed to reveal what I did but I couldn't care less as it never occurred something at the end. Did you wanted to talk with your crush without noticing it was you ? I think you have an idea
Of course I created a fake account on Instagram.

-I was insane. totally INSANE.-

A profil picture, some followers, and I started War. I had dm him with a false identity.

-I feel so bad to telling you this.-

I started asking questions about his life and obviously his ideal type of girl.

-I was crazy at the time.-

And I decided to ask "do you have this kind of girls in your high-school that you like?"  Knowing exactly that there was girls like that. I wanted him to say that he had a crush on me.
But never happened, who the fuck will say something like that to a stranger.

After 2 days I dropped this idea to talk with him. I had enough to run after him without him noticing it.

- I wanted him to do the first move but he never did.-