The Proposal

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"Dude! That is so loose butthole!", Blake yelled at Anders, his arms thrown up. "No! You're loose butthole, man! I'm just looking out for us!", Anders yelled back. Blake rolled his eyes. "Hey, guys," Adam said as he entered the house. "What's going on?", he inquired. "What's going on is that Blake here wants to be loose butthole and get another housemate," Anders explained, clearly mad at Blake. "I'm not being loose butthole! I'm just saying that we have a spare room—," "Our office", Anders interrupted, but Blake continued "and each of our portions of the rent would go down!" He then turned to Anders angrily. "We don't even use that 'office'! Plus, we work in an office!"

Adam nodded as he took in all of the information and arguments. "Mhm," he hummed, then said "I mean, maybe Blake is right... rent feels like it's getting crazy high." Anders scoffed loudly. "You guys are insane! A fourth housemate would totally throw off our balance!" "Really? Well I think our balance is strong enough to withstand just one other person," Blake said sassily. Adam nodded in agreement.

Anders was about to snap at him again, but an idea suddenly popped into his head. "Okay... here's an idea: I'll let you guys try to find a roommate who we can all agree meshes well with us and, if you can do that successfully, then we can have a fourth housemate." The other two thought for a moment before nodding. "Deal," they said in unison. Blake smiled. "I have some ideas!", he said excitedly before running off. "Me too," Adam said and left as well. Once the two were gone, Anders smiled nefariously. "Yes," he whispered, "run and try to find someone who I'll actually accept..." He knew (or thought he knew) that he would be turning every candidate down and it would remain the three of them.

"Hey, Karl!", Blake said with a smile as he entered Karl's van. "How've you been?", he asked. "Good," Karl replied, "I've been having some issues with the cats that try to live under my van, but I've basically got that under control." Blake nodded and continued to smile. "Well that's cool, man," Blake said, trying to seem as interested as possible. "Hey, so it turns out that we're looking for a new roommate and I think you would be perfect! Would you be willing to come over and talk to Anders, Adam, and me for a roommate interview kind of thing?" Karl shrugged. "Sure, but I feel like I've got a pretty sweet thing going here," he said, motioning around him. "How about you come over tomorrow and you could look around and see how you feel?", Blake suggested. Karl shrugged again, but nodded. "Okay," he agreed. "Awesome!", Blake said.

As he was exiting the van, he bumped into someone trying to get in, causing him to fall forward and onto the other person, pinning them to the ground. "Oh! Dude, I'm sorry!", he said, trying his hardest to get up. "It's all good," a voice said with a light chuckle. What caught Blake's attention as he was standing up was that it was a woman's voice. His surprise almost caused him to fall over again.

The woman must've been about his age or maybe a bit younger. She had short brown hair that was tied up in a messy ponytail and dark brown eyes. Blake noted that her style was much like his; it consisted of a T-shirt, some looser-fitting shorts, and a pair of black Converse. Her outfit was more masculine, but her face was soft and feminine.

"Ruth! What's up?!", Karl said to the woman. She smiled. "Hey, Karl! What's up, dude?", she replied. Karl shrugged. "Not much. I've been having some issues with the cats that try to live under my van, but I've basically got that under control," he said. "I'm going to have to take a look at some of those cats," she replied, then turned to Blake, who was now standing outside of the van with her. "Who's this?", she asked, pointing to him.

Blake was still a bit surprised. "Uh... I'm Blake," he said nervously. Ruth smiled and offered her hand for him to shake. "I'm Ruth," she said. Blake took her hand and shook it, noting how strong her grip was. "It's... it's nice to meet you," Blake said with a nervous smile. Ruth noticed his nervousness and smiled warmly at him. "I swear I don't bite," she said, causing Blake to chuckle. "Well, that's good to know," he said, still kind of nervous.

Ruth turned back to Karl. "I've got the weed you asked for, but you're going to have to pay this time because I'm about to get kicked out of my apartment," she said, half joking. "Oh, man. That sucks," Karl said, then had an idea. "Well, if you need somewhere else to live, Blake is looking for a new roommate," he said, proud to have had an idea. Ruth turned to Blake. "Really? I don't want to be the type of person who bumps into you and then asks to move in seconds later, but would you be willing to maybe consider me? I have references, a job, and I always pay rent on time," she told Blake, accidentally letting some of her desperation show through.

Blake was now very uncomfortable and unsure what to do, so he just smiled and nodded. "Really?!", Ruth said excitedly. "Here. I'll give you my contact information," she said, taking out a notepad and scribbling her name, phone number, and email on a piece before ripping it out and handing it to Blake. "Thanks," she said, "just for your consideration, y'know?" Again, Blake just smiled and nodded. "Coolio," Ruth said, "you wanna smoke some weed with us?" "Uh...", Blake began. "Of course he does," Karl said, "he loves weed." "Actually...", Blake said, "I should probably get going..."

He swiftly made an exit. "Bye, dude!", Karl shouted to him as he left.

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