Fearless (Oneshot!)

"I'm Sorry, Sensei..."

For Ladyspiderbug

*leaves tissues on a desk*

Enjoy!

~*~

It's been 5 months since Splinter died.

Since then, the Hamato family has changed. The turtles and Karai were all struggling with the loss. They each carried some of the blame and guilt. Even though it was none of their faults.

Mikey was still the happy-go-lucky turtle everyone knew and loved, but he acted more mature and calm at the same time.

The orange bean felt that if he had been more mature to begin with, he could have somehow realized Splinter was in danger.

Therefore, Mikey put a lot of pressure on himself to be better and stop goofing around so much. He forced himself to be more like his siblings and less immature.

Donnie felt major guilt. He continuously beat himself up for not being smart enough to figure out Splinter was going to die.

Donnie berated himself for not being able to save Splinter's life, even though the rat died instantaneously. The genius put a ton of pressure on himself to plan ahead for every possible scenario.

The second-youngest didn't eat or sleep for days after the tragedy. Raph had to literally drag Donnie to the kitchen and force him to consume more than black coffee.

Speaking of Raph, he felt extreme guilt. He'd been right there when Splinter was impaled. Raph felt should have reached out and took the hit or pulled Splinter out of the way.

But, it all happened so fast...

As a result, Raph forced himself to protect everyone. He refused to let any of his siblings leave the lair for any reason. Raph put intense pressure on himself to keep his family and friends safe.

As for Karai, she carried a lot of regret about not being there that night. She blamed herself for not spending enough time with Splinter when he was alive.

The lone sister forced herself to spend more time with her siblings. She was convinced that if she didn't, they'd be the next ones buried six feet under.

Karai put pressure on herself to be more involved in her brother's lives and be a better sister. She was also convinced that she wasn't good enough.

They all carried guilt. All of them felt that they could have somehow prevented Splinter's death and saved his life. Each teen put a lot of pressure on themselves to be better, stronger, and smarter.

But Leo?

He was the hardest on himself.

The oldest turtle was walking around the dojo. His eyes froze on the shrine he and his siblings had made in honor of Splinter. "I miss you...father..." He whispered, looking at a photo of Splinter.

Leo closed his eyes and tried to think of the good moments he'd had with Splinter. His mind immediately landed on a memory that happened when Leo was 10. He'd gotten very ill and Splinter had taken care of him. He'd saved Leo's life.

At this memory, the blue-masked brother grinned faintly. "He was just...so amazing. He looked after four kids at once while teaching us everything he knew to make us the best we could be."

Leo always thought Splinter was great. Ever since he was a tot, Leo had admired Splinter. Now, he admired his father more than ever. More memories came to Leo.

The time Splinter helped Raph learn to control his anger.

The day Splinter let Donnie have a lab.

The time Splinter taught Mikey how to cook.