Swipe of Fate

Chapter 5

Starting today I will be more regularly updating Swipe of Fate for all of you who have tuned in! Every Wednesday, expect a new chapter from Ava's twisted descent into her life as a serial killer. Once again, I appreciate all of you who have commented already so much. Here is the next chapter:

I didn't know what my friendship with Ethan would entail after this, but a Monday night dinner at a local (and allegedly famous) burger restaurant seemed like a good start. 

Casual, testing the waters of if I could really be friends with a boy I had slept with and who then promptly rejected me. 

I was trying to be one of those 'cool girls' (so eloquently coined by Gone Girl), a special breed who can sleep with anyone and be friends with anyone and nothing bad would happen. 

I appeared to feel free, but in some way I was intensely focused on appealing to the typical college (fuck)boy, who wanted easy, demand-less emotional support and sex. So I wasn't free at all. 

Meanwhile I truly thought if I just didn't have sex with Ethan again, he would give in and decide we just had to date. It was immature and problematic, but I believed and hoped it would happen.

And what do you know? I was right. A woman withholding physical affection can always work wonders in the beginning. 

When I walked into the burger shop, I saw an expectant, if not nervous Ethan sitting down at a table by the line to the cashier.

I could tell something was off with him; his smile seemed more uneasy. But when I walked in, that same beautiful smile widened anyway. 

"Hi, Ava." He stood up.

"Hi, friend," I placed emphasis on the word just to tease him. 

He visibly cringed, and I realized this was an uncomfortable scenario for him too. 

I wanted committed love and a relationship. 

He wanted a girl to have casual sex with him while providing immeasurable emotional support and healing from his childhood wounds. 

The two didn't mesh well, and perhaps neither was fair at this point.

We walked toward the cashier, and I noted he didn't hold my hand. But of course he didn't. 

We were friends, I reminded myself again and soon it became the only thing I could think when I looked at him. We were friends, but I wanted to kiss him every moment I was with him.

Something peculiar occurred at the cash register though. Ethan told the cashier once we walked up to him that we were 'together.' 

I raised my eyes. Friends had never been 'together' under one check when I went out with my female friends. He avoided my questioning eye, I thanked him, and we seated ourselves in the casual diner, fitting our style of relationship.

"So, I'm about to try the famous cheeseburger I've heard all about," I stated. 

For some reason, Ethan was talking less, looking at me with a strange gaze and just generally being more awkward than he had been before (ditto to me). 

Both of us didn't seem to know how to navigate this friendship.

"Oh, yeah. It has all the kids in my country bumpkin town running for miles to this city," he said, still appearing dazed. 

He was usually sharp, insightful and could talk about anything from one line I would say for what seemed like hours. 

Or had that been because of the alcohol when we were together the last time?