-*| In For It | Jack Brewer |*-

chap 4 - the set up

I was outside in my garden doing karate, but somewhere along the way I stopped and I just found myself thinking. I used to never think about things before doing them and although I dont wanna  admit it I would always pay attention and I would always put so much effort into everything I did.

That all changed when I cost my mums life.

Normally when people change its for the better. I don't think I changed for the better. My mum always told me I had become so brave after everything that I was doing amazing because i kept going and that I was so strong, that no one would be able to go through what I did, but I don't think i got stronger. I got weaker, I put up bigger walls. I tuned almost everyone and everything out. I dont think thats changing for the better, or being brave.

The one thing I still tried hard at was karate. I put more into karate than I ever had before. My dad loved seeing me do karate and to me karate was one of the ways I kept his memory in my mind alive. I practiced everyday as I knew it was my dads passion, but sometimes I really wanted to quit sometimes it got all too much. My dad is what made me want to do karate, I loved doing karate with him, I wanted to be like him. I missed how i felt about karate, and I never thought I'd get that passion again.

I kept a diary almost as if my dad would read it, I felt I owed it to him after everything that happened even though I knew he was hardly up in heaven sipping a cup of tea on a green lounge chair reading my diary's. Although a part of me made me think he did. 

I was snapped out of my thoughts when i got a text. It was From Bri, Brianna. She was one of the girls I was so called 'friends' with. Bri was the cheer captain, she was gorgeous, boys were all over her, she was the type of girl you were jealous of. I never really cared about popularity me getting into Bri's friend group was kind of a mistake and I'm still not sure if its a good thing I'm in it or not.

"hey ! Bri here x was j wondering if you wanted to hang out with all of us down at the mall xo txt me back !" 

I debated on whether i should go or not. I mean I wasn't doing anything right now, but i really didn't want to go, but i wasn't doing anything, but i did not want to go, but i should probably clear my head. 

Long story short I went.

I debated on tying my hair back but i settled on wearing it down. I picked out a top with some washed out blue denim shorts before grabbing the keys and saying goodbye to my mom.

I texted Bri "hey! at the mall in front of falafel phils wheres ao? x"

Thats when I saw him. Alex was standing with his back towards me 10ft ahead. I got tricked into a date. Oh f*ck-

short chapter ik but i'm excited for the next one !