My Fault ?

Untitled Part 1

Sometimes, I wonder what exactly is wrong with my life, I cloud help to wonder is this all my fault? But after countless times I asked that to myself I always end up with the same answer, it's my fault.

With that thought in mind, I Firdaus always wandering if my life can have gone batter if I use my head for once not just for academic purpose is not like I have the best grade in school but for example if I give more thought for the people around me, my spiritual emotions and the most important one what if.

As you all my expected if some one say stuff like that probable they have a regret to the certain degree.

And if you want to know what regret I have my live you guys should read my story to the end hehe

I'm 20 years old your normal university student. and my live have turn on me when I was 18 years old

At that age I think I could just become normal college student when I graduate high school, well don't get wrong, thought until today I'm still think that my live is very lucky but it just not the live that I will have when I done with my high school.

In 2019 there's a virus that have been outbreak. And with that virus I believe not just me that having a negative impact in our daily live. But there's is nothing I can do I just must accept this and move on.

When the outbreak happened entered to my country my mother, father and brother get the virus and the tree of them need to get to the hospital as soon as possible. And the bed thing is the timing is the same time as the time I need to take my university exam, well I think it's hopples now if I want to go to take my exam. And this is the first mistake that I make and this is the start of my bizarre adventure.

Well if you think I give up on university exam on that day because of my family, your guess is incorrect, because when I go to hospital I know the truth about my whole my family financial when I need to pay for the hospital bill.

My mother never allowed me to know what circumstances happened in our home. And because of that I always assume that we have decent amount of savings in our hand because my mother job in the past was a lowyer and my dad is just your normal salaryman until I finished my high school, and they always said you can go to university and you don't need to worry about the money.

I'ts been two months since my family sick, my father and brother already out they just need one week to have fully recover but my mother still didn't show any sign of waking up. Until the next day I see her she's already open her eyes and the first words she told me "I'm sorry my child". And with that we have long chat, my mother told me everything about our circumstances and I was baffled with the truth not because how bad it is but how can fix this.