Bedroom Disasters [Sasuke x Reader]

Woops!

I was ready. I felt sexy and ready to feel all of Sasuke's glory inside me. We would move together synchronically, our bodies singing the sweetest and finest tunes I've ever heard.

Hah, nope! I was not ready to feel Sasuke's weiner - not at all. Many of my girls cared to inform me that their first experience went well, however I felt the opposite would happen for me. Especially when I Googled for others' thoughts about it. But we were about to find out, in just a tad moment...

"[Name], are you sure?" my lovely boyfriend asked. You know, Sasuke, if you keep asking I might just change my mind and you won't get any. At all.

"Yes." And just to prove my answer, I pressed my body against his, so he could feel my everlasting, fiery heat for him. He released somewhat of a groan, to which I took that as encouragement. I pulled him in for a passionate kiss where tongues entangled and meshed with each other, saliva on saliva mixed and hair grabbing was involved. Yes, lots of rough hair grabbing.

Apparently he seemed to have enough of my domination over him and the tables turned. We landed on the bed with him on top - of course - and he continued to send sweet lip contact to my skin. His aim was to travel lower and make out with my tatas but alas, the bra was an obstacle.

"Damn it," he muttered, all disgruntled. As if he had seen this in movies, he grasped the middle part of the bra and pulled. Hard.

"Ow!" I yelped. "What do you think you're doing?"

"I'm trying to rip it off of you," he simply said. And he continued tugging, pulling me, the heavyweight along as the bra was lifted. "Okay stop, stop! Sasuke, release your hand from the bra now," I demanded. He did as told and the band snapped to my chest. Hard. "Fucking duck shit!" I rubbed my poor sternum. This was not how sexy time was supposed to go.

I unhooked my bra from behind and released my confined twins. He immediately attacked them with love and I relished in the amazing feeling I received. He made his way down, down, down to where my treasure was located and pulled down my panties -correctly this time, mind you I didn't want anything else wrong to happen - and said, "This looks weird."

"... Excuse me?"

"It looks weird," was all he said.

So much for sexy time. My eyebrow ticked with irritation and I barked, "Take out your peewee out and we'll see whose body part is even weirder!"

He raised an eyebrow and smirked. "But this peewee is going to go right in you." I felt the hot rush and excitement run through my body. "Why don't you strip for me, big boy?" I returned the smirk with just as equal slyness.

"Hn." With the only suaveness I swear he could pull off, he removed his sleepwear with such sensuality. All the other girls must be drooling... as they sleep unawares because they don't get to see none of this! Out popped his sausage, cooked and ready for me. It bounced slightly from the effect from removing his boxers, waving hello to me.

Just to get back at him, I bluntly said, "Caterpillar."

"Mine is bigger than a caterpillar, thank you." He tsked in annoyance and I saw his banana deflate just a little.

I cheekily smiled at him and laid back on the bed. "Come and get me, big boy."

Sasuke smirked at me, taking charge once more and hovered over me. He settled his arms beside mine and- "Ow! Damn it, get your bony elbow off of my arm," I yelled in pain. He removed the edgy pressure from me and apologized with guilt on his face.

"This isn't going well as I pictured it," he muttered.

"Yeah, you're telling me." To return to the seductive mood, I grabbed his hand and placed it on my chesticles. He squeezed in response and I asked, "Do you like that?"

"Hn... As a matter of fact, I do."

His fingers trailed lower to my forbidden area and began to rub my button. I sighed with pleasure. "Mm... Now we're talking."

And then he slipped a finger inside and it burned like a crackhead on fire. "Wait," I stopped him. "Don't go further yet. It hurts."

He kissed me, a kiss so gentle as if I would shatter from it. He pushed in further just as his kiss turned more ravenous, more searching. He began to move the appendage at a very slow pace, one I was becoming used to as the burn faded. The burn was replaced by a fiery feeling that seemed to become even more wild by the second. "I think I'm ready, Sasuke."

He pulled his finger out. "You sure?"

"Give it to me, sexy boyfriend of mine."

He settled over me once more - no elbow poking pain this time, thank you very much. I felt his heat very close to my lady bits. I saw him grab his no-no area and set it to where my cave hole was. He glanced at me and I smiled at him reassuringly.

He pushed in and- "NO SASUKE STOP." He looked at me, confused because just a second ago we were romantically stargazing into each other's eyes.

"Get away from my butthole."

"Oh," was all he had to say for himself.

"Yeah, oh. Your eggroll almost slipped onto the wrong dish."

He corrected himself and I swear, the tip of him was just comparable to a leaky faucet. "Wow, are you sure you're not close to coming?" I remarked.

"Be quiet," he said in disgruntlement. This time, he pushed in correctly and holycrapwaitcrapisn'tholyofallgods! "I'M BEING SPLIT IN HALF!" I wailed horrendously, however highly exaggerating. This isn't how I wanted my first time to be as I rather wanted it loving and romantic. But you know, that went out the window a long time ago (by a long time ago, I meant thirty minutes ago).

Sasuke seemed panicked and stayed still, although he attempted to show a display of confidence. "It'll go away soon." He lowered his lips to me and assured me through sweet, caring words. I gave him permission to dig deeper and the pain started up all over again. Great.

This seemed to happen about, I don't know, ten more times? I mean really, how big is Sasuke? Or rather, how slow is Sasuke going in?

Anyways, his wholesome dingdong was finally inside and it felt right. Oh but wait! I felt something liquid rush into me, rather than something liquid rush out of me. I don't believe my cooch is able to do something like that so...

"Shit," he grunted. His cheeks were a nice tinted pink. "Sorry."

I closed my eyes in defeat and wondered if he ever read Icha Icha Paradise. He could use a tip or two.

This will have an indefinite amount of chapters xD I'll end it when I feel like ~ just writing for jokes ahaha