Collateral Damage

33

Audrey opened her eyes to the smell of bacon burning. Specifically, burning not just cooking, followed up closely by strung together curses of frustration. She got up and strayed toward the kitchen, finding Alexander shaking out his hand, his finger tip in his mouth, the kitchen awash in smoke.

"Fucking Debby, 450 huh? 450? Why did I listen to the divorced white woman," he sighed.

"350."

He looked up and lit up at the sight of her.

"Never turn the dial from 350. One thing my mother taught me." She said softly.

He grinned. "Audrey. I'm um, making breakfast. For you."

She quirked her brow. "Why?"

He shrugged. "Okay I was thinking last night about how you get better at something. I mean there's only one way to get good at something —"

"Practice," she finsihed, sitting at the table, nibbling on a piece of burnt toast.

"Practice," he harmonized with her. "And I thought so I'm not good at love and relationships and the best way—"

"So you're practicing not being a piece of shit?"

His face fell as he glared at her. "That's a mean way to put it but...yes. I am going to practice being...in love. And eventually, I'll be good at it."

He pushed her his phone, which she went through quietly, looking over the page. "Okay this is weird even for you old man. Let's see here:" she squinted. "How to show love. Jesus man, are you that emotionally constipated, Steel?"

He glanced back at her and noted she was smiling.

"Making meals to eat together," she recited. "Sharing hobbies. Movie nights. Traveling—"

"I booked us a cruise for the summer, and I bought...so many art supplies. And other things for us to do together."

Audrey smiled softly to herself. How long had he been up doing this? She scrolled through the list. It was a variety of things no doubt picked out from the web. From homemade cards to diamonds. Her heart fluttered.

"You really wanna do this stuff? I mean, it's not your style. And what about work?"

Alexander turned around and pursed his lips carefully before speaking. "I have spent my whole life working. Working for money. For recognition from my father. I want to work to be better for you. Because you'll demand it of me."

He turned around. "And I wish I could fix that. I do. I wish you knew to demand better of me but if you can't or you won't, then I will. I'll be better. I will be worth you. I'm going to treat you well Audrey. I'm going to love you, like no one's ever loved before."

He turned back around with a grin. "And I'm gonna work hard at it."

She sniffled. "What the fuck? That's so sweet. No one's ever—"

She turned around sniffling trying to stop crying, her eyes aimed at the ceiling as she fanned herself.

"I'm gonna get up and hug you give me a second,"

He chuckled and kissed her head, hugging her. "It's okay, Audrey. I know, I'm like fucking Shakespeare and could anything less be expected of a man with a name like Alexander Remington—"

"You fucking dick," she laughed through her tears. "This is not about your lame ass name. Be honest: ChatGp wrote that?"

He blinked. "I consulted a thesaurus."

"You geezer," she chuckled, putting her arms around his neck.

"I um, I did ruin this food so...take out." He cleared his throat. "And then meds."

She rolled her eyes as he cleared the table. "Ugh don't say meds it makes me feel like inpatient. How long do I take these again?"

"Rest of your life. Don't know how you keep forgetting that," he murmured setting them in front of her. "Anyways," he typed deftly, ordering food. "I have to get to work—"

"Wait seriously. But it's Saturday, I thought...the whole speech was," she trailed.

"No I'm fucking with you. We'll go to the fair. What do you think. It'll be cute. A classic date, huh?" He smiled. "We'll start over."

• • •

Alexander held Audrey's hand very close to his chest, slightly terrified her lose her in the crowd. After two turkey legs, 3 rides and four things of cotton candy, Audrey was finally slowing down.

Alexander held her hand in one hand and tucked under his other arm, were the prizes they'd won together, and the remnants of her food.

"You're going through this second heart a little fast," he murmured. Stopping at a bench, and sitting down. Audrey sat next to him, the fireworks beginning to go off.

"This was actually fun. I thought it would be grosser." He remarked.

Audrey looked up at the fireworks. "Hey, Alexander?"

Alexander turned to her. Her face was lit up, and he couldn't take his eyes off her. Her words were meant to be lost to the roar of the fireworks overhead but he heard them anyway.

"Thanks. No one's ever worked for me before. Put effort into me. It means a lot. So...thanks."

Alexander just smiled, and, knowing his Audrey, didn't acknowledge those words, the words she wouldn't want him to hear. Instead he put his arm around her and sat a plush sloth in her lap.

"He looks like you. Look, he's tired. He's even wearing a crop top just like you," he teased her.

"You asshole, it's a full sized shirt on him." She argued. "You're so ineffectual you couldn't even turn 41."

"I'm plenty effectual, you're just mad, because you haven't worn a shirt this isn't a 2T, since you were, well, in a 2T."

"Fuck off. I always knew you were in crack, Steel."

"That must be why I can stand that godawful personality of yours, you think?"

"Eat shit and die, Remington."

"You first, brat."

He grinned, and turned his eyes to the show. And so did she, both grinning happily, not even noting the appalled looks of the people surrounding them.