Angel (Troyler AU)

'often'

Tyler's POV

The most recent message I had was from Connor. The surprise and anger hit me like a brick, but I had to mask it. I didn't want to hurt myself tonight, much less Troye if he was standing too close.

"Ty, everything okay?" the angelic man spoke behind me.

"Couldn't be better," I replied, managing to sound actually okay. He hugged me to him from behind and kissed my face. I really wanted to kiss him, really kiss him, but I felt like he has line of some sort I couldn't cross. I was happy with just this though, leaning back into him, not wanting any other embrace. When we got into the uber, he immediately pulled me into his lap, and I hoped and prayed this wouldn't be just some hookup. After a few hours I knew I wanted more than a hit and run, but I kept in mind he traveled around the world, he'd probably be leaving LA within the next few days, but I wanted to change that, or go with him.

Lord knows I need to leave this city.

I turned into my back, reaching up to play with Troye's hair. I knew my sexy persona was fading, but I couldn't help it. I saved my real self for people I thought wanted to know the real me, and I was almost convinced Troye could be that person. He was so gentle, elegant, sexy, adorable, adventurous. But he was also contradicting, and I wanted him in the most sexual way known to man and fuck him senseless, but I wanted to treat him like my boyfriend and bring him home flowers and cuddle all the same. Unfortunately I felt incapable of loving Troye, due to my passion of BDSM.

***

I didn't exactly remember falling asleep, but I awoke in someone's arms carrying me. I was confused, scared almost, but I knew it was Troye's pale skin without even having to look up. I decided to pretend I haven't even woke, fluttering my eyes shut again.

"So beautiful, you're so beautiful," he whispered. Despite how bad I wanted to open my eyes and see it was him who was speaking to me, I didn't. I stayed silent until he arrived at my front door. He shook me in his arms, and I could feel him getting weaker under me. I yawned and he set me on my feet, still
holding onto me, allowing me to pull the keys out of my pocket and unlock the door. I saw him memorizing the house, since a good amount of it was made of glass. It was gorgeous, I knew that, but something about Troye ogling it fed my pride, and my hope. I stumbled into the house, nearly falling on my face because of the amount of alcohol I'd consumed. I headed straight for the kitchen, which was just across the room. I pulled out two bottles of water from the fridge, and slowly moving around the kitchen, finding Nutella and a pack of cigarettes, then turning to head out, handing a bottle to Troye. He kept an arm around my waist as we headed up the spiral stairs, probably making sure I didn't fall. I gestured him into my bedroom, and wordlessly dropped everything onto my bed, heading for the bathroom. I kept the door open though, just so he had something to look at. I undid my tie, then stripped off my blazer and undershirt. I could feel Troye's eyes on me, but made no move to acknowledge him. I brushed my teeth and took off my pants, finally leaving the room. I glanced up to see Troye was sprawled out, in nothing but his underwear, staring at the ceiling. I was taken aback by the sight, the moonlight just perfectly hitting his cheekbones, the city lights in the background, his pale chest with dark features, and his intriguing dark blue eyes, now trained on me. I felt my heart twist in a loving manner in my chest, so I picked up a cigarette as lit it, inhaling and climbing over Troye, he parted his lips, probably unintentionally, but I took the chance to release the smoke into his mouth and he inhaled it himself. I held myself up above him, after I placed the cigarette in his mouth while he took it between his fingers, and slowly moved my hips down to greet his. I finally cracked, not being able to resist not kissing him. I bent my head down slowly, almost brushing lips with his until he cleared his throat. I raised my eyebrows in questioning, but he just shook his head.

"We should go to bed, I'm extremely tired," I nodded in half agreement, as it sunk in that he didn't even want to kiss me. Maybe he does have some line I can't cross, so I got off him, and after chugging half the water bottle, I shoved everything off the bed and climbed under the covers, feeling Troye do the same. I didn't want to turn to face him though, I was oddly hurt at his rejection, I didn't want to be. I didn't need to feel anything for the boy, but oh god, I did, even if it was only a few hours. He sighed loudly, as an effort to get me to pay attention, but I didn't bother. He shuffled toward me, pulling me back against him for what felt like the millionth time. I didn't mind it though, it was comforting, so I turned in him arms, rested my head on his chest, wrapped my arm around his waist, and fell asleep within seconds, forgetting about everything except Troye.

***

I awoke as a loud ring filled the room, feeling Troye's breathing, reminding me he was still asleep. I untangled myself from him, groggily getting up and answering my phone, not bothering to check who it was.

"Tyler Oakley,"

"Tyler, I know," I didn't even have to ask who it was, just knowing it was Connor.

"What do you fucking want Connor? I don't plan on feeding your needs," I snapped. My heart physically ached, because it wanted to tell him everything was okay between us, that I still loved him, that even if he treated me like shit, I still wanted him.

"You, Tylerrr. You. I want you baby,"

"You're drunk. Stop calling. I have somebody over," I replied, trying to keep my voice from cracking and revealing too much.

"Babe, don't do this, I never ever meant to hurt you, come over," Connor's voice was sloppy, I loved and hated it.

"Tyler?" Troye asked. I hung up the call, and turned around.

"Yes Troye?"

"What's wrong?"

At that moment in time, I lost it. I dropped to my knees, releasing the phone, and burst into tears. I had never spoken to anyone about what Connor had done to me. The one person who cared about me was the one who had shattered me. And you can't be fixed by the person who took your heart and abandoned it. I rested my head in between my legs, releasing all the pain I've been hiding for years now.

"Baby, it's okay. I've got you." Troye whispered, sitting beside me, pulling me, once again, against him. I let tears fall into his chest, just letting them fall while I stared at his pearly skin.

"I've got you," he repeated, and he pulled my chin up to make me look at him. He pulled my glasses off, wiping every tear away, never breaking my eye contact. Checking my watch, I noticed it was 4 am, but I was too wide awake and turned on, I couldn't just go back to bed. Troye noticed this, and pulled me to my feet. I couldn't see very well, and I didn't trust him all that much, but I didn't believe he'd physically hurt me right now, or ever really. He tangled his hands in my hair, and I could see him smiling as he leaned in, pressing his lips softly against mine. Troye was shaking so hard, not even from the cold, but from nervousness.

I'm going to show him there's no reason to be nervous when he's with me.