The moment I entered my room, I calmly locked the door and closed the blinds—leaving only a small light of the moon outside from the gap of the blinds. I just wanted to calm my nerves. I wanted my mind to have some peace.
I practiced my breathing exercise, then counted numbers in my head as I tried to divert my attention somewhere else, away from the noise downstairs.
"Breathe," I uttered. I finally sat down on my swivel chair, got my pet, and put her down on the study table in front of me.
After five minutes of staring blankly at the ceiling, silently questioning the heavens when all these shits would end, I stopped when I realized something. I know that I look like a fool because obviously, I won't get an answer. Ang labo ng hinihiling ko.
Hindi na dapat ako magpaka-stress sa mga bagay na hindi ko kontrolado.
"How have you been?" I asked Peach instead, my white Peruvian guinea pig, as if she was going to answer me. All she did was stare at me with, I assumed, a little smile on her cute lips. "You're so chubby." I smiled, combed her long hair, and rubbed her belly because I really missed her.
She was fluffy and almost looked like a tiny Shih Tzu! Sarap niyang panggigilan lagi.
Her hair is very long and soft. She's making chutting noises. It means that she's happy, so I gave tickles. She liked to cuddle, which I love. I feel like nawawala ang stress ko for a mean time, kapag naglalambing siya sa 'kin nang ganito.
Nakakatuwa. I'm really glad that she's here because, swear, I feel like the pain I was experiencing is being healed whenever Peach is here.
Nakakapagod kung nakatira ka na nga sa bahay na gan'to, tapos ay wala ka pang makakausap na matino. I prefer to talk to my pet rather than my family. Mukhang tanga, pero mas ayos. Also, Devon's asleep. Hindi naman akong pwedeng manggulo na lang bigla sa kwarto niya.
I needed him to be asleep at this hour; I don't want him to be awake right now. Not in the situation like this.
"I'm so hella tired," I uttered and frowned.
I feel like my body will give up at any moment now. Oras na dapat ng tulog ko. It's already past midnight. I want to sleep. My mind just won't let me do it. I got home late because I had to work overtime, since the library's still not closed at this hour because midterm na next, next week. Kailangan ng magbabantay at mag-aassist sa students hanggang gabi.
Nakakapagod dahil mag-hapon akong nasa university, pero hindi ko naman ginusto na ganito. If I were asked, I would always choose to study and bury my face in books instead of just working. But, I had no choice. I really needed to save extra money, so I had to stay there even though I badly wanted to go to sleep early.
Plus, the pros here is that I decided to use it as a reason to distract myself. Well, it's kind of my escape—being gone in this house.
Mas gusto ko na lang ngang tumira sa labas kaysa rito. But of course, naniniwala ako na hindi lahat ng gusto ko, makukuha ko. Although it's a law of attraction, it's obvious that I can't always have the peace I crave.
"Ano ba naman kayo! Tanginang pamilyang 'to!"
I sighed deeply and started to drum my fingers against the table. My family is downstairs. From here, I could hear them throwing things and making a loud noise inside the house. I could hear them swearing. They were fighting again. Even my siblings were yelling at each other.
That was the moment when realization hit me.
I won't have a peaceful life as long as I'm living under this roof.
YOU ARE READING
When Time Stands Still (Acosta Series #2)
RomanceEustacia Calli has dreamed of becoming a veterinarian since she was young. She longed to create a path of her own, willingly to make herself happier and carefree-but because of the messed-up life she lived, her dreams disappeared as silence grew in...