"Take a rest," Madam Lucian commanded when she saw me trying to ask other staff what work I could do.
"Tapusin ko lang po ito," I replied in a small voice. I smiled a little, but despite that, I was tempted to wrap everything up and just continue my work.
I was completely dying to have a break. Kanina pa akong umaga dire-diretso sa mga ginagawa ko. I wanted to go home already, but I don't want to be rude knowing that there are still some orders that need to be completed and delivered today, so I had to step up and do the tasks. May mga umuwi na kasing staffs.
It's not that they are forcing me to work on something that I wasn't assigned to—for example, making these bouquets since I was originally on duty as a cashier. I only wanted to voluntarily finish these because who else would do it?
I just don't want to be talked about if anyone sees that there are some things left undone, and I was here, but hindi ako nagkusa. That's why I'd play it safe.
Although there were times when I just wanted to give up. Ang bigat na minsan ng workload, to the point that my body often aches, and sometimes I am palpitating because of the coffee I have to drink three times daily.
I was not a coffee person. I just had to drown and wake myself up with caffeine because I literally have so many things to do. For some reason, I couldn't sleep properly, knowing that there were things that always bugged me. That there are always things that need to be finished immediately.
I wanted to rest and prioritize myself, but I knew I couldn't—the heck, I can't even try to do that.
I was exhausted, but I couldn't take a day off because it was only a waste for me. I need to study harder, as I badly need to excel in class. I need to be better so that I can apply to Australia. I also need to work to pay my bills and fund Devon's education. That's why I can't have a rest. I couldn't leave my undone stuff behind.
Everything is just so hard to deal with.
I wanted to give up, but the responsibilities that were given to me were holding me back. It always haunts me.
"This is ten thousand," I said to Madam Lucian as soon as she handed me the envelope of my paycheck after an hour.
I counted it again, hoping that I was just not in the right mind. I mean, is that possible na magkaroon agad nang ganitong kalaking sweldo? Lalo na at kakasimula ko lang? I checked the money again with my wide eyes open while I stared at her, questioning if she just calculated it wrong.
"'Wag mo 'kong kwestyunin na para bang hindi mo 'yan pinaghirapan," she answered, as if she read my mind. "That's for you. All of that. You worked hard here for one month," she added, then left immediately without even giving me a chance to talk anymore, leaving me flabbergasted.
I suddenly had the urge to doubt myself and be confused more, but then I chose to believe her that quickly. I didn't have the time to think about it for long. I just kept in mind that baka nga ay deserve ko naman ng ganitong halaga.
Ten thousand. That's a lot. I remember that I needed to buy books for my next semester.
I was thinking that I'd buy a set of them, but—No. I know that Devon needs them more. I should pay for my brother's tuition fee first.
"Okay." Huminga ako nang malalim, hindi na nakipag-talo pa sa isip ko, at kinuha na lang ang phone ko para mailista kung ano ang mga mas kailangan kong unahin.
It's a good thing that I grew up being good with handling money, so it wasn't hard for me to divide them accordingly: payment for my brother's tuition fee and service, for the books and equipment that I need in MedTech, and for my daily expenses, which I believe should be my mother's responsibilities as she promised that she would take care of us forever, but I guess promises are meant to just fucking break.
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When Time Stands Still (Acosta Series #2)
RomanceEustacia Calli has dreamed of becoming a veterinarian since she was young. She longed to create a path of her own, willingly to make herself happier and carefree-but because of the messed-up life she lived, her dreams disappeared as silence grew in...