Intimate

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My body feels gross
My mind is heavy
My heart is confused
I've dug this hole here, and I don't know how to get out.
How did this happen? How did I get here? Where did the time go?
Am I not 8 years old anymore, riding bikes and dancing in the rain?
Always untouched, and now touched by many.
I can't get it off, I can't wash it away. Why can't I wash it away?
I feel used.
I feel unseen.
I wanna scream.
You see me? I'm a human being too you know.
Please make it go away. Wash it off me. Rip my skin off. Take my bones and my blood and wash me.
Put me back together.
And maybe, just maybe I'll be untouched again.

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