Embers of Discord

Chapter Twenty-Five

Sirius-

I find myself seated in a muggle restaurant, enjoying a  lunch with my uncle, Alphard Black. His letter had arrived a few days ago, expressing his desire to meet with me.

 In this chaotic web of family drama, he stands out as the sole beacon of sanity and love. As expected, my parents wasted no time in disowning me. However, Uncle Alphard, in a surprising turn of events, has decided to bestow his wealth upon me through his will.

Mid-conversation, a coughing fit seizes him, and I swiftly reach for a glass of water to offer him relief.

 "Thanks, my boy," he says, his voice raspy.

Once the coughing subsides, his wrinkled hand gently lands on top of mine. 

 "You don't have to feel obligated," I remark, my voice tinged with a mixture of gratitude and reluctance. In truth, I have no desire for his wealth; I am determined to forge my own path and earn my own money once I graduate.

He gazes at me, his eyes filled with understanding. "I believe in your abilities to find a job and make your own fortune," he replies, his tone filled with reason. "However, I have a need to entrust my wealth to someone."

Knowing my uncle's unwavering resolve, I realize that objecting would be futile. I nod silently, accepting his decision.

"By the way, have you found yourself a girlfriend yet?" 

Uncle Alphard, always curious about my love life, wiggles his eyebrows as he poses the inevitable question.

I chuckle, fully aware of his ever-present interest in my romantic endeavors. "No, Uncle," I reply, shaking my head. "I'm not into relationship."

 "Why not?" he probes, genuinely interested.

"I've never liked a girl that much."-I shrug. 

"Ah, that must mean you haven't come across that special girl yet," his voice fills with a touch of wisdom as he says- "Tell me, have you ever met someone who effortlessly drifts into your thoughts, keeping you awake at night? Someone who stirs emotions within you, making you feel... something?"

Normally, I laugh at these questions. But today-

An unexpected image flashes through my mind—a girl with captivating brown eyes and flowing brown hair. The thought startles me, and I quickly suppress it.

Seeking to divert the conversation, I decide to ask a question of my own, changing the subject. "Uncle, have you ever been in love?"

 Despite never marrying, he must have had romantic experiences in his life.

A wistful smile appears on his face as he reminisces. "I did fall for a girl once during my time at Hogwarts," he confesses, his voice tinged with nostalgia. "Her name was Jasmine. She was a sweet, unassuming girl—beautiful, both inside and out. In my youth, I was a bit of a player, something I'm not particularly proud of."

"Did the two of you date?" I ask, a bit surprised and a bit eager to uncover the details of his past.

He nods, his eyes glimmering with the memory. "Yes, we did. I was head over heels for her. She had a way of bringing out a side of me that I didn't know existed."

Curiosity piqued, I press further- "Why didn't you settle down with her then?"

He looks down at his hands, regret washing over his  face.

Uncle Alphard's gaze turns somber as he looks down at his hands, regret etching itself upon his face. "When she expressed her desire to marry, I became frightened," he admits, his voice laden with vulnerability. "It wasn't because I didn't love her enough; it was because I was afraid. Afraid of opening my heart fully, afraid of the possibility of her leaving me. Having never experienced love from my own parents or brothers, I questioned whether I could truly make her happy."

I can sense the lingering pain of that decision. The silence hangs heavily between us as I absorb his words.

'Where's she now?- I ask quietly.

Uncle Alphard's expression morphs into one of palpable anguish. "She found someone else, someone she married," he replies, his voice heavy with emotion. "They went on to have children together. I saw her at a party once—she looked genuinely happy."

I remain silent, the weight of his past and the consequences of his choices settling upon me.

"You know son, love's a tricky thing"- Uncle Alphard clutches my shoulder firmly- "It has a way of sneaking up on you when you least expect it, sweeping you off your feet. It can make you feel invincible, capable of conquering the world. But if you turn away from it, you'll be left with nothing but regret and pain. It takes courage, my boy, to surrender to love."

His words resonate within me as I make an effort to digest everything.

With a gentle intensity in his eyes, he continues, "One of these days, you will also fall in love. When that time comes, don't settle for just anyone. Choose the one who doesn't come easy, the one you have to fight for. And once you find her, never stop fighting for her."


Struggling to contain my thoughts, I  blurt out, "There's a girl."

Uncle Alphard's smiles as he catches onto my hesitant confession. "A girl?" he echoes.

"But she kinda hates me and I-"

"You love her?"

"No"-I say immediately.

Then, I pause, struggling to find the right words to convey my complicated feelings. "Well, our dynamic is... complicated," I begin, stumbling over my words like an awkward fool. "It's not love, per se, but there's a certain fondness I feel towards her. It's not romantic, though. I just... like her, in a way."

Seriously, what's wrong with me??
 I silently chastise myself for the tangled mess of my thoughts.

Uncle Alphard's smile remains unwavering as he absorbs my hesitant words. "Then, my boy, why are you sharing this with your old uncle?" he gently prompts, his eyes filled with both curiosity and warmth.

Fuck.

 I shouldn't  have opened my damn mouth.

A mix of frustration and self-doubt fills me as I realize the implications of my confession. "I mean... I used to bully her," I admit, my voice tinged with regret. "She's in Slytherin, and I... I misjudged her. But as time went on, I realized I was completely wrong about her. She's actually a genuinely nice person. The problem is... she really hates me."

I trail off, as I lay bare the mistakes of my past. It's as if a dam has been breached, and the words tumble out without restraint. I've already revealed so much, so why not share the full extent of my inner turmoil?

Uncle Alphard remains attentive, his eyes fixed on me as he offers a patient ear.

"Have you ever apologized to her?"

'No- I never got a chance to. She either ignores me or she will just quarrel with me.'

He laughs. "You never got a chance or you didn't know how to do it ?"

'How do you ....know that?' 

It was true. I rarely say sorry even if I'm at fault.

Uncle Alphard smiles knowingly, his eyes filled with understanding. "Well, my boy, it's a trait I've observed in you, just as it was once a part of me," he explains. "But listen to me. You have a good heart, Sirius. Never let the mistakes of your past define the person you are becoming. It takes strength and humility to apologize, but it's an essential step towards growth and redemption."

 He pauses for a moment, then starting again-

"Listen, son, you made a mistake, and it's crucial that you rectify it," he advises, his voice carrying a tone of wisdom. "A true man always owns up to his mistakes. You need to approach her and sincerely apologize. It might feel awkward, but it's something you must do. She has likely been hurt by your actions, and she didn't deserve it—no one does."

His words strike a chord within me, resonating with the truth I had been avoiding. I take a deep breath, a renewed determination welling up within me.

' I will apologize to her soon.' - I confirm

Uncle Alphard's eyes fill with pride and affection. In that moment, I feel a sense of reassurance, like a child who has sought guidance from a trusted parent. It dawns on me that I truly needed this conversation, to confront my own shortcomings.

As I reflect on his words, I realize that this issue has been weighing on my mind for far too long. It has consumed my thoughts and plagued my conscience, persistently reminding me of the need for resolution. The prospect of seeking her forgiveness now lingers in my mind, an opportunity to alleviate the burden I have carried for so long.. Maybe once I ask for her forgiveness , it will go away on its own.