*mature 18+ content
Pictures of Us - beabadoobee
12 August, 2022
With his hands rummaging through the plastic bag that had been sitting near his feet for the whole road trip, Matty searched for an empty bottle. He had downed one of Coke about an hour in, so he knew it should be in there—he just couldn't seem to find it amongst the rest of the rubbish.
"You're not weeing in my fucking car, Matty!" exclaimed Este, attempting to keep her eyes on the road but ultimately being drawn away into the man-child sitting next to her and all of his antics.
Matty continued sifting through the bag, ignoring her protests. "Please, it's not like I'm gonna piss on your floor. And I've done it plenty of times before, so my aim is pretty good—Oh! Here it is,"
The Coke bottle from earlier found itself in his hands, preparing to be unscrewed. Matty had been complaining about his full bladder for the past half hour and the next place for Este to stop wasn't for another 15 minutes. As soon as the make-shift toilet came into her view, she grabbed it and threw it over her shoulder and into the back seat. It bounced around and landed on the floor, out of sight. Out of sight, out of mind, Este hoped.
"Love! What was that for?!"
"Grow up and hold it in for a couple more minutes." Este threatened, reaching to turn down the radio's volume before studying their surroundings in her mirrors and making a risky lane-change. Matty smiled at her habit of needing to quiet down her surroundings in order to focus.
He scratched the back of his neck. "Dunno if I can,"
Her eyes rolled at him. "You're going to have to." She said sternly.
"Well, then drive faster!"
Trying to listen to his girlfriend's orders, Matty laced his fingers together and politely sat his hands on his lap. Focus, Matty, he thought to himself. His leg bounced up and down feverishly, to distract from the pain in his abdomen.
They sat in silence for the last stretch of the road, with Este's eyes set on the GPS that guided her, and Matty squirming in the passenger's seat. He kept complaining; and she tuned him out playfully. At one point, he even began undoing the zipper to his trousers, pretending to use Este's car as a toilet instead of waiting for them to arrive at the petrol station. Matty wouldn't actually do it, and just wanted to make her laugh. It did—though she didn't like to admit it.
When they did arrive, he barely let Este put the gear into park before he burst out of the door and ran into the Shell while she refilled the tank.
"All good now." Matty said when he came back, smiling widely. "No bottle of piss for you today," They high-fived in silly celebration.
"I think I didn't want you to wee in here because I'm just jealous. Not even because I think it's gross." admitted Este, laughing as she spoke. "I like, anatomically, could not even pee in a bottle if I tried. We'd have to pull over and find a bush for me to squat in."
He shrugged nonchalantly. "That's one of the many perks of having a dick,"
"Many?" She gave him the side-eye.
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