Chapter 39

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~ ~ Ivy ~ ~

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~ ~ Ivy ~ ~

If something was going your way, always expect the universe to fuck that shit up.

I tried to steady my hand applying my eyeliner at the same time blinking away the pressure building behind my eyes.

"Fuck!" I lowered the pen and moved my head back.

What the hell was wrong with me?

Normally, I wasn't an over-emotional person, but I was sure feeling it right now. It was a storm of pride, pain and anger.

It had been two days.  I should be over this already.

What I couldn't shift was the look on Alex's face every time I stopped and thought about it for too long.  His eyes had been bright, wide, filled with longing and panic.

But I'd done the right thing.

Then why did it feel so fucking shitty?

Duh...because you went and fell in love, dumbass!

I groaned out loud, but was thankful I had a distraction this morning.  "Get your head in the game, bitch!" I threatened the woman staring back at me.

And for the third time, I tried again to apply my eyeliner.

Right now, I needed to be in my Domme headspace. I was due a scene with one of my favourite subs here at Risk.

Harry Carmichael.

A sexy silver-fox who was as handsome as he was submissive.

And just the distraction I needed.

He too had some high up position at the government. Pity it wasn't in immigration.

Sighing, I finally finished and assessed myself.

Today I wore a black corset with fiery red ribbons, a short black skirt and knee-high boots with four-inch heels. Not having any energy to put into my hair, I'd left it down.

Meh.  It would have to do.

I couldn't muster up the usual enthusiasm. Applying a final coat of Red Carpet Red lipstick, it was time to head on down, having already been informed of Harry's arrival.

I could do this.

Two hours of not thinking about them.

I let myself into the room and wasn't surprised to find Harry ready and very willing to serve me.

That alone should have sent the usual thrill through me, but today. Nothing.  I was stuck with this empty hollow feeling.

Focus! Game-face.  I gave my head a little wobble.

The only sound was the rise and fall of Harry's breathing and my eyes set upon him. He was, as always, in the display position. Naked on his knees with his hands behind his back with his head bent.

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