Counting Stars

7. one step closer

Something is different, in me, in the way my days are moving. In a way it feels like they are going faster.
From one quiet drive to nowhere when we are just enjoying being silent in each others company, to where he makes me lough sitting in a park across the road from my apartment.
Two weeks has flown by and I'm beginning to realise that I'm waiting to the end of each day to see him again.
It's like he's being very careful not to get to close because i try to keep my distance, but i see in his eyes his movements that he wants to be closer, i feel his eyes on me sometimes when im looking away.. i try my best to not show him how much i want him to come closer to see that part of him that can finally break me down.
I've been feeling good lately and honestly it worries me because I'm still sick.
I can't get to attached to him because i know that my time won't be enough to shere this with him.
What is happening to me? I didn't want to get to close to anyone but he just won't give up.
He comes over every day at six thirty and his smile kills me over and over again.
My doorbell rings and i know what's to be expected when i open it.
"Hi" he says once i open the door. He hands me a red rose and i take it from him "oh waw what is this for?" I ask surprised "it's our two weeks anniversary! Did you forget??" I smile looking at him "do you wanna go for a walk? I know this place not far from here.." he asks in a low voice
I nod my head, close the door behind me and we stark start this evenings adventure.
We walk down a street surrounded by trees and and its quite, he takes my hand and i look at him for a moment feeling a strange wormth spreading up my arm, his electric to me.
"Are you ok?" He finally asks "sure, where are we going?"
"I think it's over here.." he suddenly changes direction and pulls me if the path between some trees, we end up in a small park its looks to be isolated like some secret garden. It has a small fountain in the middle and flowers all around.
I look around "oh god it's beautiful here , what us this place?" He smiles leading me to a small bench "you like? I spend a lot of time here when we are on leave. Amm this place makes me happy. So, i want to share it with you." He finishes and stares straight into my eyes. I feel like my breathing is getting a little faster. I turn away trying to keep him from notecing how nervous i am. "Oh and its practically my back yard.." he says and gets up walking twords the small fountain.
"What?" I get up after him "what do you mean your back yard?" I stand next to him
"This is my place" he points up to a big villa in front of us. I look up at it "we live here, i mean my kids and i" i look at him surprised "kids?? You have children?"
"Yeah seven of them" he turns to me with a whicked grin. "I talking about my members, the group, you know? They all have their own places but we usually stay here. Its just more convenient withe job and everything."
I nod, i think he noticed that i am a little surprised to say the least. I look at the fountain trying to avoid looking at him.
"Do you want to meet them?" He is still looking at me i can feel his eyes on my face
"Amm, maybe some other time? It's just i didn't think you lived so close."
"It's sort of a secret this place, not a lot of people know we live here. So i can trust you will keep it right?"
I look at him "of course.." i say and our eyes meat. He takes a step closer really slowly like he's trying not to scare me of. The butterflys in my stomach start going crazy once he puts his hand on my arm gently turning me twords him.
Hes not talking anymore but he is with his eye, studying my face my lips. I study him to, his deep expressive eyes his nose his dimple that appears more when he smiles, his pouty lip. What am i doing? I think to myself but it feels like im hipnotized by him.
He leans over and kisses my cheack so softly a shiver runs up my body. He's so close now i can feel his breathing. And then his lips touch mine, its so tender and soft i feel dizzy.
Like the ground is pulled from under my feet.
It's a soft lingering kiss, just a touch of our lips and his quite groul like he finally got what he desiered.
I can hear how my heart thumbs in my chest. I kissed before but it never felt so good. Something about him made me loos my ability to think straight. He disconnects his lips from mine giving me a moment to realise that he has his arms around me.
I open my eyes looking up at him "i wanted to do this since the moment i saw you" he whispered and i coughed my breath making him smile softly.
I took a step back out of his embrace "I'm not pressuring you into anything but.. i just want you to know that..." His sentence was cut short by a lowd howl and then another one and another. He smiled Rowling his eyes "well i guess its now or never."
I got nurves "what is it?" I asked looking around us. "you were asking about my kids?" He junped on the edge of rhe fountain spreading his arms twords the villa "my children!" He yelled and the howls turned into human lowd loughter "Daddy! Daddy!"
I realised what was happening looking up twords rhe high balcony. 4 young man were standing there clapping and screaming something in Korean i didn't understand.
They aventualy went inside thou one has remained standing there quitely just starting at us.
"Amm.. Chan maybe i should go back home" i said as he jumped off the fountain standing close to me making me nervous again.
"Did they scare you?" I looked up seeing the remaining guy still standing there.
"I think he's not happy.." he looked up and the guy stepped away and into the house like he felt Chan's will.
"That was LeeKnow, he's a good guy just worried about me".
I looked at him not knowing what to expect or think. And a dizzy moment made me take a step back.
"I don't feel so good so i should just go home for tonight.." he looked disupointed but still had a soft smile on his lips.
"Ok, I'll walk you back"
We got to my place in ten minutes, walking in total silence just enjoying the company of each other.
My mind filled with confusion like everything is some weard dream.
He didn't touch me again after we got to my place just promised that he'll see me again soon.